This
by SparroeOrtiz78
Summary: Selena Fox ex-Marine now Luann Delaney's assistant at Cara Cara is attacked by one of Georgie Caruso's men causing her to move in to SAMCRO's clubhouse where she finally finds a place to fit in. Kind of AU. Suggestions of violence.
1. Lego House

"Hey Lyla. Ima." A tall brunette clad in tight blue jeans and a tight leather vest said.

"Hey Selena. You helping Luann out today?" Lyla asked the woman.

"Yeah." She walked away from the two blonds heading for Luann's office. She knocked on the door, "Come in."

She pushed open the door to see a blond man standing there talking to Luann, "Oh sorry. I was just letting you know I'm here. I'll start setting up for the first scene." She barely glanced at the blond man but she could see him smiling.

"Thanks hun. Make sure Ima's ready and after you finish dressing the set, will you get the costumes ready?" Luann asked her and she nodded closing the door.

_Jax_

Once the door close Jax asked Luann, "Who's that?" Luann gave him a look, "Off limits. She's an ex-Marine. She doesn't sleep around." Jax smirked at Luann, "No Jax I'm serious."

"Why is she an ex-Marine?" Jax asked playing with the rings on his hand. "She got court martialed." Jax smiled, "Sounds like Tig. I'll talk to you later Luann." He left her office and was heading for the door when he saw her rubbing Ima down.

He made his way toward them, "Alright Ima you're done, you can go." Ima saw Jax but Selena didn't, "No, you can go, Selena." Jax was standing behind her but she didn't notice him, "How 'bout you move ya ass out of my sight before I kick it."

Ima gave her a look and left. Selena turned and ran into Jax's chest, "Oomph, Sorry." Jax steadied her, "It's cool. Just wanted to introduce myself since I'm your boss, Jax Teller."

Her eyes ran from his head to his feet in seconds, "Selena Fox. Nice to meet you but I'm kinda busy so if you'll excuse me." She went around him. He watched her walk away. The girl was leggy, busty and curvy in all the right places. Her long chocolate brown hair was braided down the back and it went past her ass.

Her face had high cheek bones, bright green eyes, and soft plump lips that he wouldn't mind kissing. He shook his head and headed out the door back to the clubhouse.

_Selena_

The day was over and her back, feet, everything hurt. She had her bag in hand when she heard Lyla calling her name, "Hey can you give me a ride?" Selena smiled at the blond, "Yeah, where to?"

Lyla adjusted her bag, "Teller-Morrow." Selena nodded, "Sure but you have to feed me." Lyla smiled, "Deal."

They had just pulled in to the lot and she had put the car in park, "They got a bathroom I can use?" Lyla nodded, "Yeah in there."

"Thanks," Selena jogged off to use the bathroom. She was coming out of the bathroom when she ran into someone, "We have to stop running into each other."

Jax chuckled while she rolled her eyes, "Laying it on thick aren't you?" Jax shrugged, "Hey pretty girls make me stupid." She laughed and smiled at him, "I bet." He followed her down the hall, "Hey I got you to laugh and smile so I must not be that stupid."

She shook her head, "No I'm just laughing at your stupidity." Jax placed his hand over his heart, "Ow lady that hurt." She raised an eyebrow and told him to, "Suck it up."

Jax's eyes widened, "You're a hard one." She had almost made it to the door, "Not as hard as you apparently." There was a hiss around the room and a couple damns. Selena glanced at Lyla, "You good? I'll see you later Ly."

Once she walked out the door Lyla busted out laughing, "Sorry but you're not the first guy to try flirting with her. She's not easy." Tig who was setting at a table asked, "Prefers women?" Lyla shook her head, "No, she's just jaded I guess."

_Selena_

Selena went home to her small hotel room putting her bag down in a chair making sure not to drop it too hard. She threw herself across the bed without a shower or changing. She fell asleep thinking of a blond biker.

She was roughly shaken awake. Somebody was grabbing and pulling at her. She started having flash backs of being in Iraq. She fought the man off of her and went for her purse. He grabbed her ankle causing her to fall hitting her head on the dresser.

She rolled over onto her back. She could feel the blood running down her face. The man was standing over, "You stupid bitch all I wanted was for you to deliver Luann a message but no you scratched me. I think I need to teach you a lesson."

She started to panic and then her training kicked in. She kicked his legs from under him and got herself to her feet. This time she made it to her purse grabbing her cell and the M9 she keeps in there. She dialed Luann's number and pointed the gun at the large man on her floor, "Don't fucking move I'll kill you."

Luann picked, _Hun you're late. I need you here._

"I got a rude awakening this morning Luann." She was shaking but she hid it well.

_What do you mean, Selena are you okay?_

"No Luann Georgie sent someone here to give you a message."

_Shit, is he still there?_

Selena swallowed, "Yeah he is."

_Okay honey I'm calling Jax he should be there soon. Don't do anything till he gets there._

"Okay Luann. I'll wait." She hung up the phone. She kept the gun pointed at the man, "Why did you come here?"

The man smirked at her, "because you're not protected. No one's close enough to save you. You're all alone out here. Do you know this is a whore motel?" The man stood. "You're easy pray bitch."

"Not so easy now." The man shook his head, "No you're still easy." He moved toward her, "Don't fucking move."

The man laughed, "Or what you'll shoot me, little girl you don't have the balls."

_Jax_

He was hanging out on the picnic table when he got the call from Luann. "Juice, Chibs come on."

"What's up?" Juice asked glancing around. "One of Luann's girls is in trouble. Now let's go." All three headed out toward the motel.

They pulled into the parking lot. Jax took his helmet off, "Luann says she's in room 306." They were heading up the steps when they heard a gunshot, "Shit." They took off running toward the room.

Juice kicked the door in and Jax went in first with Chibs and Juice behind him. Jax put up his hands once he saw Selena with a gun pointed at them, "Better late than never huh? You better leave, I can handle the cops."

They put their guns away and moved inside the room while she lowered her gun but kept it in hand. "Shit you okay?" Chibs walked closer to her, he moved the hair that was covering the cut over her left eye, "Ya gonna need stitches for dat. It's deep."

She gave him a blank look, "You are?" He nodded at her, "Chibs and dats Juice." She nodded, "I'm telling you guys I've got this go. I'll get Luann to call you later just go. Ya'll don't need this shit."

_Selena _

After they left she sat on the bed waiting for the cops which she had called. The gun was on the bed beside her. She stared off unfocused; she was having flashbacks of the thing that changed her life forever. It was a regular day except for this feeling of unease she had.

She was heading back alone from the chow hall when someone grabbed her from behind. He threw her into an empty tent, she hit the ground hard enough to knock the wind out of her and as she laid there her life flashed in front of her eyes. The man's face came into view it was her Commanding Officer. He pinned her hands above her head never saying a word.

He pulled her pants off and forced himself on her; she cried and begged him the whole time. Over a period of months he would come to her and do the same thing. She couldn't report it she was too far from home but eventually it ate at her and she lost it. It was one of those days and she'd had enough. She waited for him and as he entered and closed the tent she shot him. He died instantly.

A voice broke her free from her nightmare, "Charming Police." She cleared her throat, "In here." Unser and Hale entered the room. Hale picked the gun up off the bed, "What happened?" She explained, "And then he came toward me and I got scared so I pulled the trigger."

Hale moved her hair and saw bruising all over her neck. They were all over her arms and then there was the gash in her head, "Self-defense but we'll have to get the hospital to document the bruising and cuts. Are you okay with that?" She nodded.

"Okay I'll take her over. Document everything." Hale helped her up and walked her to his Jeep.

She was in a paper gown and they were taking pictures of everything; she'd been through this before after she had shot Lt. Marse. She zoned out thinking about how to disassemble her M9 and then put it back together. "Okay you can get dressed now and then we'll stitch you up."

Deputy Chief David Hale stayed with her the whole time and he asked her as the doctor finished sewing up, "Do you have a place to stay?"

"You can go," the doctor said.

Hale and Selena walked out into the hall, "Um, I," She broke off when she saw Luann and Jax walking toward her. "Oh hun, are you okay?" "I'm fine Luann." Hale glared at Jax, "I was just asking Miss Fox if she had some where to stay."

Jax answered, "She'll be staying at the clubhouse so we can keep an eye on her."

"Right," Hale said sarcastically. "Here's my number if you need anything, give me a call." She nodded, "Thanks David." He smiled at her and left.

"Come on I'll take you to the clubhouse." Jax said and she followed behind him looking just a little lost.

_Jax_

She looked worse than when he found her in the motel room. The cut was closed but the bruises were a deep purple some were even black. They were at his bike, he handed her a helmet and waited for her to get on.

She got on and slid her arms around his waist. Driving to the clubhouse he considered the things that happened to her today and the fact she was so clam. He came to the conclusion it wasn't her first kill.

He pulled into Teller-Morrow, "We'll get your car later. I'm sure we have something you can wear if not Mom loves shopping." She smiled at him, "You don't have to do this."

Jax shrugged, "Hey you're my employee and I take care of my employees. Come, I'll get Half-sack to make you something to eat."

She followed him in. Opie was sitting at the bar, "Playin' price charming again Jax?" Jax shook his head, "Nah she saved herself. Selena this is Opie." Opie held out his hand than notice he had grease on it rubbed it on his pants before holding it back out, "Nice to meet you sorry I was rude."

She just raised an eyebrow at him and then looked at Jax, "Do you have anything I could change into? I would like to get this blood off." Jax nodded, "Yeah hold on. HALF-SACK."

Another blond man appeared, "Yeah?" Jax shook his head, "Do you know where that box of clothes is?" Half-sack nodded, "Yeah I'll I'll just go get it then."

"Half-sack?" Opie nodded, "Don't ask please don't ask." Half-sack came back with a box, "It's mostly underwear so….."

Selena made a face and started looking through the box. She found a shirt with SAMCRO on it and a pair of cotton shorts which she briefly smelled to make sure they were clean. "Sack show Selena the showers." She followed Half-sack down the hall and they heard her ask, "Why do they call you Half-sack?"

Opie shook his head laughing and turned to Jax, "What happened?"

_Selena_

Half-sack explained but he didn't show it which she thanked god for. He let her in a room, "this is Opie's but I guess it's okay if you use it. I'll tell him you're in here." She nodded, "Thanks."

He left her in the room. She walked into the bathroom. She closed the lid on the toilet and laid her found clothing there. She turned the water on and stripped off her clothes. Once she was only in her bra and panties she got a good look at the scrapes and bruising on her body it was worse than she thought.

You couldn't make out the dog tags on her ribs or the dream catcher on her left shoulder blade. The words Blood, Sweat, Tears on her right were the only thing you could actually see. She sighed as she finished undressing. Stepping in the warm spray of the shower her muscles relaxed and she felt better.

She dressed in the navy blue cotton shorts and the SAMCRO shirt. She padded barefoot out into the bar, "What's SAMCRO?" Jax and Opie turned to look at her as did everyone else in the room. "Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club Redwood Original."

The guy that answered her was older with gray hair. She nodded, "I see." A blue eyed curly haired man walked up to her, "Who is this lovely lady?" She smiled at the man, "Not interested."

Jax laughed, "Tig this is Selena she works with Luanne." Eyebrows went up around the room, "No I don't make them. I'm more stage crew." She looked past Tig at Jax, "You said something about food?"

"Right Half-sack. He'll take care of you." She followed Kip to a kitchenette, "SO are you like their bitch?" he frowned at her, "What? No, well kind of. It's like being in the army again."

He started to make her a sandwich, "Soldier huh? How did you end up here?" He shrugged, "You know shit happens and I found somewhere I fit so I stayed."

She nodded, "Yeah I get that I'm still looking for my place. I was a Marine." He looked at her, "No shit. Really?"

She nodded, "I can show you my dog tag tattoo if you want proof." He finished her sandwich, "Here. So why did you stop being a Marine?" She took a bit and shrugged, "Shit happens."


	2. Just A Taste

She woke up disoriented and sweaty. It wasn't her first time waking up like this, and being in a war zone kind of screws with your head. She never dreamed of the rape, it was always watching the man beside her get shot and bleeding out while explosions were on going in the background. Watching the light go out in his eyes was the hardest thing for her because the man had become like a brother to her.

She threw the blankets off and left the room heading down the hall into the bar. Men were lying all over the place with naked girls. She was walking behind the bar when she heard a snort, "Shit." She jumped hitting her hip on the corner of a table.

She waited but there was no movement or noise so she continued on. She grabbed a water bottle from the small fridge and moved back toward the room Jax had put her in. She was thinking and didn't notice as a tall Hispanic man was coming out of one of the rooms.

She bumped into him.

"Sorry." He had his hands on her arms.

"It's alright. I'm just heading out for a ride. I wasn't expecting anyone to be up."

"Me either but I couldn't sleep so I'll um, just go back to my room." She started to walk away. Juice fixed his vest and got an idea. "Hey do you want to go with me?"

She smiled at him. "Yeah."

Juice headed back into his room and brought out with him a pair of sweat pants.

"Here put these on. Do you have any shoes?" She nodded and headed toward her room. She pulled the sweats on then her timberlands. He laughed, "That's cute. You look so gangsta."

The comment made her laugh. "Are you taking me for a ride are not?"

He held out his hand which she took, "Come on."

_Juice_

He couldn't sleep; his brain just wouldn't let it happen, so instead he was going out for a ride to calm himself. He never expected to find Selena in the hallway. When he asked her if she wanted to ride, he thought she would say no and was pleasantly surprised when she agreed.

Have her riding behind him felt as comfortable as being in a warm bed. She nestled into his back and her arms weren't extremely tight, which meant she wasn't afraid. They rode around Charming for a little while, just taking in the slowly raising sun and the stillness.

He pulled over at a park and they got off before heading for a picnic table. He was surprised she sat so easily beside him after what happened. Actually, the whole situation was surprising him. "Why are you so relaxed?"

She looked at him, "Um, I guess because I know I can handle myself ...unless you completely blindside me or hold a gun to my head."

He frowned. "Has something like that happened to you before?"

He offered her a cigarette which she took. "Yeah and it ended the same way."

He saw the storm cloud in her eyes, "You've killed before through? I mean you were a Marine."

She nodded, "Yeah I did. That's not why I couldn't sleep." He lit her cigarette for her.

"Then why?" She blew out,

"I had PTSD before any of this shit happened, so I can get over it but I still dream about losing my best friend when shit gets rough."

Juice nodded, "How did they die?" She pushed her hair back.

"We were clearing a house and he was standing outside the door and someone was on the roof. They hit him in the neck but that didn't kill him. He bled out waiting on med vac."

Juice put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close, "I'm sorry."

She nodded into his neck, "Yeah me too. Why couldn't you sleep?"

He shrugged, "I can't get my brain to shut off."

"Why come out here when you could have got one of those girls wear you out?" she asked.

He shrugged, "Some days that works and others, well, it doesn't. I like riding at night when there's no one on the roads. It's peaceful."

She smiled at him, "Who are you, Shakespeare?" Juice laughed.

"Oh yeah, I could see it now, I shit thee not thy is a motherfucker whom deserves to be beheaded or some shit?"

She laughed, "Have you even read Shakespeare?" Juice shook his head.

"No but I seen that movie with um what's his name? Oh yeah, Leonardo Dicaprio, that shit was awesome."

"Oh my god. Are you serious? The old one was the best." Juice frowned.

"There's two?" She blinked at him.

"Did you even go to school?"

He shrugged, "Yeah till I got kicked out for fighting. I made it to the eleventh grade." She shook her head at him.

"Wow just wow. Ok so what are you good at?"

He grinned at her, "Computers." She really looked at him.

"I never would have guessed that." The sun was now above the horizon and it was on her face allowing him to see her deep green eyes better. She was beautiful.

"Yeah I get that a lot, but hey I do what I'm good at and I feel useful. What about you? I mean you work at Cara Cara but you're not in the movies."

"I'm good at killing things, shooting, and fighting. I would like to start boxing again." He gave her a wide eyed look.

"You boxed?"

She nodded. "Yeah it's the only reason I made it through school without getting in trouble and made it possible for me to join the Marines."

"I can help you if you like I use to box. Chibs can help you too; he's trained Half-Sack for a couple fights."

She smiled at him and this time he noticed that it reached her eyes, "I'd like that."

_Selena_

They pulled into the parking lot; she hopped off the bike so he could back it into his spot. She handed him back his helmet.

"Thanks." She smiled at him again; it had been a long time since she had actually felt light enough to give a real smile. Juice nodded at her.

She headed toward the clubhouse when she heard her name being called. It was Gemma, "Hey Jax said you needed some clothes. So me and you are going shopping."

Gemma grabbed her arm and pulled her toward the car while she gave Juice a pleading look but he just laughed. "Get in."

Gemma took Selena to her favorite place, "So they're not letting you back in your room for a whole week?" she asked her. Selena shook her head.

"No David said last night that there was a lot of stuff to go over. So it'll be a while and they're not going to give my gun back at all."

Gemma was going through a rack of tops, "What are you use to carrying?" Selena picked up a pair of dark wash jeans that were her size.

"Beretta M9."

Gemma held out a purple top for her, "Go try this on. I think I can find you something similar."

The jeans fit her ass and thighs but not her waist she was going to need a belt. She put on the tight lacy purple top, it had long sleeves. She walked out so Gemma could see

"Damn. You sure you don't do movies because you would make a lot of money."

Selena smiled, "Oh yeah I have some morals." Gemma nodded.

"Okay now that I know what I'm working with this is going to move a lot faster."

By the time they finished Selena realized she never got the mother daughter time or even girl time. Being raised by a father and six brothers, she had enjoyed her time with Gemma and had found it very refreshing. It hit her as she and the older woman were in Victoria's secret looking for underclothes, what Kip had meant about fitting.

She rode back to the garage with Gemma talking about her grandson Abel; she had even showed her pictures. "So do you know how to do anything other than rubbing bodies down and killing people?"

Selena shrugged, "Yeah, I know how to fight and I can fix cars. I had six brothers." Gemma parked the car.

"Shit you poor thing no wonder, you looked lost in the store. How did you get the clothes you have at the hotel?" she asked.

Selena and Gemma got the bags out of the car, "Gifts from people. Luann bought me a lot of stuff."

Gemma shook her head, "Well that just means I'll have to teach you the ways of shopping."

"God help us." Clay said as he kissed his wife's cheek. "I'm going to be late Johnny didn't show up and I have to get this car fixed tonight."

Gemma pointed to Selena, "She can fix cars." Clay gave her a look,

"Yeah come on you can help. Gemma'll put your bags in your room," he said.

Selena followed Clay as he popped the hood, "I have to change out the water pump and…" She cut him off looking down at the engine compartment.

"Means taking off the timing belt."

He handed her the tools and watched as she went through the process, occasionally helping her. He glanced at the clock as she closed the hood.

"Huh? That went faster than I thought it would. You're good. If you need extra work I'll let Gemma know how good you are. Come on, I'm inviting you to dinner."

Selena smiled at him.

Later, the woman had changed into the red jeans and tight jean vest Gemma had brought her. She helped Gemma in the kitchen along with some others. Her bruises were showing but she didn't care. "Is that a tattoo?"

She nodded at the woman. "Yeah, I have three altogether."

Selena noticed that most of the women were stoned. "Selena come here I want you to meet my grandson Abel," Gemma told her.

She wiped off her hands and walked to where the woman held a small boy, "Abel, this is Selena." Selena smiled.

"Oh he's handsome. Are you sure Jax is his Daddy?"

There was a shout of indignation from the table, "Hey, where do you think he got his good looks?"

"From his grandma." The room laughed while Gemma past the boy to Selena, "I'll be right back." Jax and Opie were watching them.

"Well don't you look comfortable?"

She rolled her eyes, "Not my first time holding a baby Jax." He smirked at her.

"I can help you hold babies."

She gave him a disgusted look, "Don't you have an old lady? Why are you such a pervert? No, blond isn't my type."

Opie laughed, "Damn cut down. I told you." Jax shook his head.

"See can't even joke around." She sat beside him putting Abel in her lap.

"If you were joking you wouldn't stare at my ass so hard."

"She's got ya there, lad."


	3. Smite

_Bobby_

It had started off as a normal day Selena had finished setting up the set and was helping Lyla with her costume. Ima was being oiled by another stage hand. Selena was walking past Ima, "Bitch."

Selena turned around, "Excuse me."

Ima put her hands on her hips, "You heard me, bitch."

"Well least you had the balls to say it again." Selena started to head to Luann's office.

"That's right bitch you better keep walking." Ima's tone was bitter.

"What the hell is your problem?" Selena stood glaring at Ima. The anger in Selena was clear.

"You. You're my problem. You walk around here like a queen." Ima was only a few feet away from Selena.

"Excuse me, Ima I think you need to get over yourself just because I refuse to kiss your ass."

"No you're sucking Jax's dick. So you can do or say anything you want." Selena was about to hit Ima. She turned to Luann who had come out of the office with Bobby.

"Luann, I swear to god if she says one more thing she ain't going to be so pretty." Bobby was watching the whole thing. Selena was pissed at Ima and shit was going to go down.

"Selena calm down, hun. You know how she is."

Selena scuffed. "Yeah well someone needs to take her down a peg."

Ima laughed. "And who's going to do that? You? Please," Ima replied.

Bobby saw the anger cross the girl's face and he knew Ima was going to go down hard.

Selena swung hitting Ima in the jaw and then both were on the floor rolling around. Blond hair tracks came out. "Perra."

Ima was screaming bloody murder while Selena was cursing in Spanish.

"Bobby do something!" Luann yelled at him.

He laughed. "Like what? If I had a camera I would film it."

Luann looked distressed. "Break it the fuck up," she told them. Selena was on top of Ima pinning her down and saying something in Spanish.

Jax and Juice came out of nowhere. Jax grabbed Selena pulling her off.

"Aw, come on, it was getting good!"

Jax glared at Bobby. "You should have broken this shit up," he said. "Selena, stop!"

He handed her off to juice who wrapped his arms around her waist. Jax held Ima help but she went for Selena so he held on to her.

She spit at Ima. "You nothing but a dirty pussy psychopath who clearly needs help!"

Ima, whose lip was bleeding along with her nose, was fast to reply. "I'm the psychopath? You killed a man!"

"I can kill you too if that's what you want!" Selena spat back.

Ima bucked against Jax's arms. "Oh please. You stupid bitch; you're just jealous."

Selena laughed, "Of what? Being a worthless whore that's never going to be the first choice?"

Bobby was shocked at the words coming out of Selena's mouth, but Luann said they had been fighting for a long time.

Ima fought against Jax's hold, "Stupid cunt, you can let go of me Jax. Luann, I quit."

Once Ima was far enough away Juice let her go. "You know what tell her I quit Luann I didn't want to work here in the first fucking place."

"Follow her, Juice," Luann asked him. Juice nodded and jogged after Selena.

"Well that was interesting... I'm going back to the books," Bobby said with a grin on his face walking back to Luann's office. Damn the girl could fight.

_Selena_

She walked into the make-up room fixing her shirt.

"Hey you okay?" She shook her head. She still felt like hitting something. She needed to release the extra energy. Juice was standing behind her and she decided to use him. She faced him and grabbed his face bring his lips down on to hers. "You sure about this?"

"Shut up Juice and fuck me." He gripped her waist and backed her into the counter deepening the kiss. They bumped into it. He let go of her to swipe the make-up off the counter. There were sounds of things break and Selena giggled. He smiled at her.

Placing his hands on her thighs he lifted her up onto the counter. She grinned up at him as she ran her hand up his shirt. He closed his eyes feeling her soft hand ran over his abs then his chest. Her hand then trailed down to the buckle of his belt. She undid it and then she unbutton his jeans. He watched as she unzipped them.

He pulled her top overhead revealing a purple lacy bra, "Does the top match the bottom?"

She leaned back on her hands, "you'll just have to check and see won't you."

He unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down her legs as she toed off her shoes. He grinned up at her when he saw that they did match. He kissed the top of her thigh and made his way up her stomach to her chest. He unclasped her bra it slid down her arms to the floor. He kissed the top of her breast before sucking and then biting down. She moaned and arched her back.

He gripped her waist and pulled her so that she sat on the edge of the counter. He kissed her hard on the mouth as he entered her. He braced one hand on the mirror and the other held her leg up as he fucked. She grabbed two fistfuls of his cut. She wrapped her other leg around him.

"Harder," she pleaded. He slammed into her causing her to moan louder.

She felt the tension building and knew she was close, "So close. Oh god Juice." He let go of her leg sliding his hand in between her to rub her clit. She bucked against him. "Juice." She gasped.

_Bobby_

They had been sitting in Luann's office talking about how much they were making when Jax looked at the clock."Bobby, go get Juice and Selena so we can go," Jax asked him. Bobby walked toward the make-up room where he knew Selena kept her stuff.

He was outside the door and he could hear moaning coming from behind the door. He opened it to get an eye full of Juice's ass and Selena's head thrown back. He closed the door and quickly made his way back to Jax.

"Um they may be a while they were a little busy." Bobby said with a smile.

Jax frowned. "What the fuck do you…"

Bobby gave him a look, "Yep, bow chicka bow wow," he sang.

Jax shook his head, "Didn't know Juice had it in him. Let's go he can bring her back to the clubhouse. At least I'll know she'll be relaxed."

Bobby laughed, "You'd think so but it's Juice so she might be even more frustrated."

They walked out to the bikes, "I wonder how that happned."

Jax laughed at the older man, "Dude she was pissed. Angry sex is the best sex."

Bobby laughed, "I don't think Juice's ever gotten angry sex. I bet she rocked his world."

_Selena_

"Can I have my underwear back?" She watched as he tucked them into his back pocket.

He gave her a cocky smile. "Nope, I think I'll keep them."

She rolled her eyes as she fixed her make-up in the mirror. "You're such a perv."

He shrugged opening the door. He waited for her to grab her purse and walk out in front of him.

"You okay, you don't need me to carry you?" She heard the smile in his voice. She knew she was walking with a slight limp; she was just a little sore but she hadn't had sex in almost six months so she expected it.

"Shut up."

They headed out to his bike, where Jax and Bobby were still sitting talking. Bobby and Jax both grinned at them. Juice frowned. "What?"

The men gave Juice a knowing look.

"Which one?" Selena asked.

Jax pointed at Bobby. "He only saw Juice's ass. So don't worry. It's all good."

Selena flipped Jax off. "Whatever. He got to see more than you ever will."

"You're a cruel woman Selena. Let's go I have to put some hours in at the garage." Jax said putting his helmet on.

_**Few days later**_

Jax had been kind enough to ask Gemma to hire her as an office Assistant. Gemma had asked Selena to fill in for her at Teller-Morrow so Gemma could go see Abel. Selena was working on some forms when Opie walked in.

"Hey," she told him.

She glanced up at him; she noticed he was frowing.

"Hey. Lyla just dropped her car off I need you to order a tire, I started the paperwork."

Selena took it from him, "Okay I'll do that first. Anything else?"

Opie shook his head. "Nope."

She watched him walk out there was something going on with him lately. She started making phone calls looking for a good deal on hybrid tires. She was on the phone when Juice walked in.

"Hey." He gave her his cockiest grin. She nodded at him while she was listening to the woman on the other end.

"Okay, thanks." She hung up the phone and looked at him. "Hi, what can I do for you?" Now he was giving her a goofy smirk. "Juice, I'm working."

He smiled at her. "I know. Take a break."

"No Juice, go away. Go clean up or something. I get lunch at 12." He sighed at her and walked out of the office looking disappointed.

She gave a small chuckle if she had it her way they weren't leave the bed.

_Bobby_

He was sitting there drinking his beer and talking to Piney. Clay walked in and talked to the men present.

"Church. Round everyone up."

Jax looked at Bobby. "Where's Juice?" Bobby slid off his stool.

"I'll get him probably playing on his god damn computer."

Bobby opened the door to Juice's room. "Shit. Ya'll need to lock the fucking door." Bobby shook his head as he heard Selena laughing. He walked down the hall with a little smile on his face.

"What?" Jax asked.

Juice came jogging down the hall. "Hey what's up?"

Bobby smirked."Not you anymore."

"Again? Damn," Jax said as Selena came walking up the hall adjusting her wrap top.

"Damn Juicy, ya left ya mark, didn't ya?" Chibs was talking about the hickeys appearing on her neck.

Bobby smiled at her, "Nice tats."

She smiled at Bobby. "Thanks. Hey, knock next time will you? I don't mind giving a show but it ain't free."

She reached into Juice's vest and took out a cigarette. As she walked away, he slapped her ass.

"Boy she is going to eat you alive." Tig said. Juice shrugged at the man and walked into church.

"How much did you see?" He asked Bobby once they were sitting down at the table.

Bobby shrugged. "Just her back and ass. I have to say that was one of the finest asses I've ever seen."

Tig was giving Juice a look. "What's she like?" Tig asked him in a curious tone.

Juice glared at him. "Man, don't ask me that. If you want to know, go find out?"

Everyone looked at him in disbeilf. "Did you just give us permission to fuck your old lady?" Opie asked.

Juice threw his hands up in the air. "She's not my old lady. I've only known her for a few months."

"So she's fair game?" Tig asked again.

Juice finally got pissed. Pointing his finger at Tig, "No! If you fucking touch her, I'll shoot you."

Bobby patted his shoulder. "That's what we thought."

_Selena_

She was sitting on one of the picnic tables playing Angry Birds on her phone. She heard the door to the clubhouse open; she didn't look up to see who had come out. She felt someone move in between her legs and smiled up at Juice who stood there grinning down at her.

"Hi." He said. His tone and his face gave away that something was up.

He kissed her. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head at her, "Hard vote. Little bit of fighting." She sat her phone down on the table.

She placed her hands on his cheeks, "Aw, does baby Juicy not like fighting?" He laughed at her.

"I like fighting just fine, unless it's in the clubhouse. You comin' to my place tonight?"

She shrugged and was about to answer when she heard an explosion. Juice covered her with his body. She was fighting to stay in the present. She saw dirt and debry flying and she was back in Iraq. Time seemed to slow; the only thing that kept her in Charming was the man lying on top of trying to protect her. Juice lifted himself up. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Shit." Juice took off toward the blown up van and where Chibs laid out spread eagle. She followed and stood watching Tara work on Chibs. She was scared for the Scott he had been one of the nicest to her; not treating her like a crow eater but a friend. She could she see the worry in Juice's face. Selena knew what Chibs meant to Juice.

She grabbed his hand while he watched Tara checking over the man he consideredto be like a father. The ambulance arrived and they loaded him in. She stood there, watching the ambulance leave as Juice wrapped her in his came up to them.

"Juice, we're meeting." Bobby was said it in a flat tone.

He nodded. "Hey will you go to my house?" He ask her. She nodded.

"Yeah call me when you're heading home."

"Thanks babe." Juice kissed her and headed for the clubhouse. She walked to the TM's office to get her stuff and took note of Jax taking to David. David nodded at her as he got into his jeep.

She got to Juice's place unlocking the door. She smiled. It smelled like Juice; musk, burnt wiring and grease. She kicked of her shoes at the door. She got a beer out of his fridge. She loved his house.

He had explained to her the first time he brought her here that he had brought it because he had never had a real home. She had smiled at him and kissed him, "I understand. My father never stayed too long in one place. He moved us around so much I've forgotten where I've been."

She finished off her beer and walked to his bedroom, stripping. She lay in his bed in nothing but her underwear. She fell asleep holding on to his pillow. She didn't hear him arrive. He didn't know he had entered the room until he lay on her kissing her neck. "You were supposed to call."

He chuckled. "I did." She hmmm'd into the pillow and rolled over.

"Can you stay the night?" She asked knowing that they were going to be busy.

He kissed her lips. "Yeah but I have to be at the clubhouse early."


	4. Familia

**Loosely based on 2x06 and 2x07**

_Selena_

Selena was working in the office at TM covering for Gemma once again. She stood just inside the office watching as Juice drug out a hose to clean up the blast site. She winced as she saw the CSI van pull up. After they and Unser gave Juice a little hell, he walked toward the office.

"Shit. What am I going to do now?" He ran his hand over his Mohawk; it made her smile.

She handed him a soda and sent him back out saying, "You'll think of something."

She was sitting at the desk filling out paper work when she heard yelling and screeching tires. She rushed to the door of the office and saw Unser with one of the Lodi guys on the ground with Juice standing over them. She tried to hide her smile as she walked out to check on them.

"Are you guys okay?" She used her concerned voice but in all honest she really didn't care.

Unser answered, "We're okay. Thanks for asking."

Selena looked at Juice who sighed and rubbed his Mohawk. The young woman shook her head and headed back toward the office when she felt someone touch her arm, and she turned around to face the Puerto Rican member.

"Hey do you think you could?"

Selena shook her head. "Jax said not to get too involved with club business. Sorry."

She kissed his cheek and walked back into the office. She would spend all night here; there was so much stuff to be done. She was filing invoices when the office door opened. Juice flopped down on the couch, "Shit. Clay's going to be pissed."

She closed the drawer and walked to him. Sitting in his lap she said, "You tried and that's all you can do, right?"

He grinned at her, "Yeah how about you reward me for trying?"

She laughed as he moved her so that she lay on the couch.

_Gemma_

She and Tara had just got back from Cara Cara firing guns. Gemma tried to go into the office but it was locked. She started to dig in her purse but made the decision to knock on the door.

The answer she got was a guff, rasping sounding Juice, "Hold on a sec."

He pulled open the door, cleared his throat, and walked past her, "Sorry about that Gemma."

Juice headed off toward the clubhouse at a quick pace. Gemma walked into the office and saw Selena filing papers. "I hope both doors were locked."

Selena turned around her cheeks were slightly pink from embarassement. "Yeah, they were."

Gemma laughed. "So, did you get any work done? Other than on Juice, I mean."

Selena nodded. "Yeah. Oh, and I'm okay to close up tonight if you need me to."

Gemma walked around looking for signs of Selena and Juice's activities. "Yeah, thanks. Hey, can I ask you something?"

Selena nodded. "Sure, of course."

Gemma sat in the chair beside the door and motioned for Selena to take a seat on the couch. She waited until the younger woman was sitting next to her to talk.

"Is there anything in your past we might need to know about? Because I need to know if you're going to be an old lady," she finally asked.

Selena fidgeted with her hands in her lap. "I get you're trying to be protective, Gemma, but I can't get the club in trouble. I don't know anything and my past is the past."

Gemma frowned at her. "No it's not. The past has a way of coming back. If it can get Jax killed, I need to know."

Selena stood and closed the office doors. "Fine Gemma but you have to know I don't have any contact with them. I know what's going on with them because of my Tia."

Gemme's eyebrow furrowed above her eyes as she stared at her. "What the fuck are you talking about? Selena, just tell me."

Selena took a breath. "My father and brothers are Mayans," she admitted.

Gemma stood up, clearly shocked at the news. "What? You've got to be fucking kidding me!"

Selena held up her hands. "Wait, let me explain, Gemma. I haven't spoken to them in eight years. They don't even know where I am."

Gemma started pacing, "Shit if Clay finds out..."

She took a moment to walk around the room, obviously having a war with her own thoughts.

"Look you're not talking to them right?" she continued, and Selena shook her head. "Okay, we don't tell them. But if this shit blows up, you're dead."

Selena ran her fingers through her hair. "I know. This is bad. I never thought I'd get this deep."

Selena had put her head in her hands; Gemma walked over to and wrapped her arms around her. "Hey, when you're in love, shit happens."

Selena looked up at Gemma in surprise. "I never said I loved him."

Gemma smiled at her, "You don't have to, it's all over your face. Go take a break. A real one, not a Juice break."

Selena walked out of the office, laughing. "Not cute."

Gemma shook her head. Juice needed to wise up and see that Selena was good for him. She was his serious side and he was her fun side. When they were in a room together, it was like they were one sometimes. The fact her father was a Mayan might cause some problems, but if no one ever found it, they would be fine.

_Selena_

She was working on a car that was being picked up the next morning when the phone in the office began ringing; it could only be Gemma. She wiped off her hands and picked up the phone, "Hello?"

_**Hey Selena I've got some news.**_

Selena's heart sunk into her stomach, she took a deep breath and asked, "What happened?"

_**Honey, they got arrested.**_

Selena sat heavily down in the desk chair. "Shit. Is there anything I can do?"

Gemma sighed into the phone.

_**No, not tonight. Close up and come to Jax's, we'll see what happens in the morning.**_

"Yeah, okay. I'll be there in thirty minutes." Selena cleaned up, closed the bay doors, and locked the gates as she headed out. As she drove to Jax's she felt anger burn through her. Why did they have to be so stupid and reckless?

She parked at the curb and got out. She didn't knock on the door and just walked in; she heard Abel cooing as soon as she entered. Tara and Gemma were sitting on the couch with Abel on Tara's lap.

"Hey." Tara said. Selena never had much interaction with Tara unless it involved Jax or Abel.

"Hi, so what's going on?" Selena asked feeling a little uncomfortable in Jax's living room. There had always been a little tension between the women.

"Well, nothing right now, but I figured you could use a little support." Gemma smiled at her. "Have you eaten yet?"

"Um, no, but it's okay." Gemma stood up and headed for the kitchen. Selena took her place on the couch. She and Tara sat in silence for a while until Abel decided he wanted to be on Selena's lap. Gemma was watching from the kitchen as she fixed her a plate.

The women started laughing at Abel who was pulling at Selena's tank top. Gemma smiled, knowing somehow that they would be okay.

_Gemma_

She woke up to the smell of breakfast and heard Tara talking to Abel. Gemma padded down the hall to the kitchen where Selena was at the stove and Tara was at the table with Abel in his high chair. "Well, don't you two look comfy?"

Selena shrugged. "Do you want pancakes?" Gemma went to the table.

"Yeah, and a cup of coffee." Selena had everything in front of her in minutes. Selena cleaned up a little before eating her own breakfast.

"Rosen's going to meet us at the clubhouse to talk about what we can do for the guys," Gemma told them. Tara nodded as she put food in Abel's mouth.

"You coming?" Gemma asked Selena who was eating and playing with her phone.

"No, I don't have anything to offer. I'll cover you in the office and take care of Abel until you're done or Anita comes get him." Selena's face was a little pale.

"What are you thinking about?" Gemma asked Selena.

Selena shrugged. "Asking my father for the money."

Gemma took a sip of her coffee. "If you call him, he's going to ask questions, he's going to want to know who it's for and then you're going to be in deep shit. Don't call him, we'll figure something out."

Tara was looking confused. "Did I miss something?"

Gemma shook her head. "No, nothing too important. I'm going to get dressed and then we can go after Abel's dressed."

Later, they had just got the bad news from Rosen about the bail and were talking about other options when Opie came flying in the clubhouse. "Where's Selena?"

Tara and Gemma both pointed toward the kitchen. Opie took off to find her. Gemma and Tara went behind him. "Opie, what's going on?"

_Selena_

She was in the kitchen with Kip warming up a bottle for Abel; they were talking about the bike he was working on. Abel was on her hip playing with her braid. She laughed as Abel stuck the braid in his mouth, cooing the whole time.

Suddenly, Opie was standing in the doorway breathing hard and looking around until his eyes found her. He walked toward her with concern on his face. "What?" she asked.

She found herself being afraid; she didn't want any more bad news, not today. Opie placed his hands on her shoulder and looked her in the eyes. It hit her then that something bad had happened to Juice. "Just tell me Opie."

Opie took a breath. "Juice was coming out of the infirmary; he was doing something for the club. He was walking across the yard back to Jax and them when somebody came up behind him and shanked him."

Selena's eyes started tearing up. "Is he alive?" Opie pulled her and Abel in for a hug.

"Yeah, he's fine. They got him in the hospital and stable. He's going to be in there for a while but he should be just fine, Selena." She grabbed on to his shirt and cut.

"Why? They were supposed to have his back, Opie." She pulled away from him. Abel was patting her cheek, which broke her train of thought and took away the anger she was feeling towards the club. She couldn't help it she smiled and took a breath.

"Thanks for telling me, Ope. Will they let me see him?" Opie shook his head no and watched her for a little bit longer before taking Abel and handing him to Tara. Opie pulled her into his arms for a proper hug.

Opie whispered in her ear. "Go ahead and cry. I won't tell him or anyone else. Neither will they."

It was then she realized that Opie was her friend even though they argued about everything and never agreed about anything. He was like her brother. She did cry in his arms because she was scared for the loss of someone she loved again.

After that he left to go finish up some things for the club. Gemma took Abel and headed out while Tara went to work. They all had expressed concern for her but she had said she was fine. She headed out to go check on Chibs. At least then she'd feel like she was doing something.

_Gemma_

Gemma and Selena had made dinner for Tara, Kenny and Ellie. They were in the kitchen, the kids working on homework as Gemma helped them, and Selena sat in the floor with Abel while Tara was working on some files.

The doorbell rang. "I've got it." Tara headed for the door. There were voices at the door and Tara's tone was harsh.

"Hold on honey, I'll be right back," Gemma said. Selena glanced up at Gemma. She stood up with Abel on her hip to help Kenny.

"Is he out of his god damn mind?" Tara sounded pissed as she came back in the kitchen. Selena raised an eyebrow. "Your friend Lyla was at the door."

Selena frowned at Tara, "Not my friend, ex-coworker..." She was about to say more when her phone started ringing.

Gemma watched as Selena looked down at the caller ID, saw her pale as she quickly handed the baby to Tara.

"Hola?"

_Selena_

She hated math and that's what Kenny was working on. It was fractions, and unfortunately for both of them, she couldn't remember anything she'd ever learned about them. She must have been sick when they taught it, she thought. He looked up at her. "Sorry kid, I can't do fractions without a calculator."

Just than Tara and Gemma walked back in. "Your friend Lyla was at the door."

Just because she was nice to people didn't mean they were friends. "Not my friend, ex-coworker…" She was about to say something else when her cell rang. She reached into her pocket pulling it out and read the caller ID:

**Angel Álvarez**

How did he get her number? For any of her brothers to reach out something must be wrong. She handed Abel to Tara and headed down the hall and out the front door.

"Hola?"

_**Hey baby Luna.**_

Angel's voice was rough and raspy but he was trying to be sweet by using her nickname.

"Don't call me that. What do you want, Angel?" She was walking out to her car because if it was for what she thought it was, she'd be leaving soon.

_**What, can't I just call and check on my baby sister?**_

He must be in deep shit if he was trying to butter her up.

"Get to the point, Angel." She was going to cut the bullshit now or they'd never get anywhere.

He sighed into the phone.

_**I need you to come and get me.**_

"Where are you?" She was a little concerned; Angel was the closest to her in age and had protected her as a child.

_**Cárcel, in Lodi.**_

She had figured as much.

"Wait, how did you get this number? Only Tia had it." If her brother had her number, he could track her, and the thought worried her. "And how are you calling me?"

_**Luna, please just come get me and then we'll talk.**_

She heard the pleading in his voice but she had to know.

"No, tell me, and I might come pick you up." She said it harshly and she meant it.

_**Fine. I asked Tia for it, she said I could only call if it was an emergency and it is. I've had it for the last four years. I'm calling you because you're the only one I trust not to kill me. The detective is letting me, I'm sitting at his desk.**_

She sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Fine, but I don't have the money to bail you out, Angel."

_**It's okay, I do, you'll have to go to my house though and get it. The bail is 5,000 dollars. Hurry, if Papi founds out…**_

"Fine, if I get you out, but no colors, no bike. Got it?" She was risking her life here but it was her brother, what else was she supposed to do?

_**Got it.**_

She was in route to Angel's house when Gemma got the good news about the boys posting bail. She was in route to the Lodi police station when the boys got home.

She walked into the Lodi police station with 5000 dollars in cash in her purse. She went to the desk and told them why she was there and they pointed her to the cashier down the hall. She gave them the money and got a paper saying if he disappeared or didn't show her money was forfeit.

She stood in the lobby waiting for him. She didn't know what to expect the last time she had seen him she had been standing on the curb with her things scattered across the yard. He had looked at her with pity on his face, but hadn't offered to help. She was a traitor; she had turned her back on the club and her family.

Her father had screamed that she was no daughter of his and she had to get out of his house. Her brothers had just stood and watched as he threw her things out. She had ended up living with her best friend until she went off to Marine boot camp.

She heard cowboy boots hitting the tiles behind her and turned around, facing Angel walking towards her; he was the spitting image of their father. Angel held open his arms for her but she just stood there, realizing she should have left him because he wasn't her family any more.

Angel wrapped his arms around her and she stiffened. "Luna, I've missed you."

She pushed away and headed out the door. "Take the cut off and give it to me."

He looked at her suspiciously. "Why?"

She was pissed. "Don't ask questions, just fucking give it to me."

He took it off and handed it to her, and she opened the trunk, throwing it in. She saw that he was about to say something. "Shut up and get in the car."

She sat in the front seat but waited, not turning the engine on and instead looking outside the window. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything, Selena." He was lying to her and she was not in the mood for lies.

"The fuck you didn't! Tell me or I'll take you back to Oakland." She was glaring at him now. He looked away from her.

"I stole some coke from the supply and was going to sell it on my own when I got caught." She stared at him.

"You did what? How fucking stupid are you?" She hit him. "He is going to kill you and then me for helping you. You had 5,000 dollars in your house, why were you selling coke?"

"I want out, Selena. You don't know what it's been like since you left. Its hell. Esai is dead, the Sons killed him. Now we're mixed up in this shit with Zobelle and I have a family, Selena, and I want them safe." His voice had become desperate with need.

"Fine, where is your family?" Selena asked with a bland tone, not giving away the fact she was jealous of him.

"I already sent them away; they're in Virginia. The least 1% action on the east coast." He was looking at her, begging for her help.

She sighed. "Okay, look, we're going to Charming. The cut never leaves the trunk, do you understand?" He nodded that he understood.

"You never talk about the club and you behave. I have some money to buy you a ticket and you leave. Don't come back, don't call me."

She got to Charming around 4 o'clock in the morning and she was irate at Angel. She pulled into Teller-Morrow to find the lights on. "Shit. Don't get out and keep your mouth shut if someone does talk to you."

Angel grabbed her arm, "This is the Sons' clubhouse. Selena, what the hell have you got yourself into?"

"None of your damn business. Stay here, I'll be right back; hopefully they're asleep." She walked in and of course someone was up, Tig of all people.

"Hey babe, what are you doing here? I thought you'd be at the hospital with Juicy." She felt her heart skip a beat. Shit, she was so mess up that she hadn't found it odd that Tig was here.

"Um, I just have to take care of something and then I'll go see him." She hurried down the hall to collect the few hundred dollars she had stashed.

She grabbed it and practically ran out of the clubhouse. She got back in the car and tore out of the lot and toward the airport. She dropped him off without a word, she could have lost her new family by helping him and she didn't want that. She went straight to the hospital. She didn't care that it was too early, she wanted to see Juice and she'd cause a scene if she had too.


	5. You Know I'm No Good

_Selena_

Her eyelids were drooping; not having slept for the last two days was killing her. When she got to St. Thomas, she went straight to the desk and said, "Hi I'm looking for Juan Carlos Ortiz."

The nurse at the desk, who was blond with a smug face, started looking something up on her computer, "Are you family?"

Selena wanted to stomp her foot in frustration. She didn't have the time or patience for this. "Yes."

"Name?" The nurse gave her a look that said 'you're lying' and that pissed Selena off.

She gave the nurse a faux sweet smile. "Selena Fox."

"Sorry, you're not one of his contacts. I can't let you back." The nurse smiled at Selena, and that was the last straw.

"Let me tell you something. You either let me see him, or I'll wait for you to get off of work and then that pretty little face won't ever look the same." Selena's tone was so sweet you would have thought the words coming out of her mouth were a compliment and not a threat.

"Is that a threat? Do I need to call security?" The nurse paled, and her tone was unsure.

"No, it's a promise." She paused before adding. "And go right ahead. The only thing they'll find is your unconscious body." She watched as the nurse gulped.

"G-g-go on back, room 210." She smiled at the nurse and walked off toward Juice's room, feeling a little more awake than before.

She stopped just outside the door, fixed her clothes, and took a breath before knocking. "Come in."

She smiled at hearing the man's voice; she opened the door and saw him lying there, watching TV. She placed her purse on the table against the wall. He turned to look at her and a smile erupted across his face, "Hey babe."

She leaned in and kissed him; it was as if the last couple of hours never happened. Her body relaxed and her chest felt lighter. She pulled away and looked into his eyes, "How do you feel?"

He sighed and winced, "Like somebody cracked my ribs, molested me, and then stabbed me in the back."

She frowned, laying her hand against his cheek. He closed his eyes and she felt him lean into it. "I'm sorry." He opened his eyes and looked at her confused.

"Sorry for what?" She wanted to tell him what she'd been doing for the last couple of hours; it was eating away at her. She hated feeling like this but it was better if he didn't know.

"That you got hurt. That you were molested. Do I even want to know?" She ran her thumb across his cheek; she loved just being able to touch him. She hadn't realized until now how used she was to touching him at least a few times a day. Maybe Gemma was right; maybe she was in love with Juice.

"No, and don't be. It wasn't your fault. Are you okay? You look tired." He patted the bed. "Come on. Me and you'll take a nap."

He slid over in the bed, folded down the blankets and grinned at her. She pulled off her Carhart jacket, her top shirt so that she was only in her tank top, and kicked off her boots before climbing in bed with Juice.

She gently lay beside him; he pulled her in to his side, placing his nose in her hair while she breathed him in. as well. He didn't smell like grease and burnt wires anymore. She didn't like it at all; he smelled like antiseptic and soap.

~SOA~

She didn't realize she'd fallen fell asleep until she heard voices talking, "How long has she been here?" She felt Juice kiss her forehead.

"Since this morning, about 6 or 7 o'clock," He ran his hand down her arm. She snuggled into his arms deeper.

"Well I'm having a dinner tonight and I was going to invite her. She can bring you back a plate." She heard Gemma say.

Selena rubbed her face and turned to look at Gemma, who was sitting in a chair beside the bed, "Hey, what's going on?"

Gemma smiled at her, "I'm having a dinner tonight and you're invited to come. I'll make a plate for Juice and you can bring him that."

Selena nodded, "Yeah, of course, if Juice is okay with that." She glanced up at him.

"Hell yeah, Gemma's cooking is so good. Girl you better bring me some food." She laughed at him.

Gemma smiled. "I heard the nurse at the desk complaining about some crazy woman threatening her. That wouldn't be you, would it?"

"What?" Juice asked, frowning down at her. She shrugged and wouldn't look him in the eye.

"She wouldn't let me see you. What was I supposed to do? Beg her? Fuck that." Juice started grinning and Gemma was laughing.

"You threatened someone to see me? Awe baby, that's hot." He said huskily.

"Do they have you on morphine?" Selena asked Juice. Gemma was laughing at them; she watched as he leaned into Selena and she never moved away.

"Yeah, but I've missed you so much. I hated being in prison, Selena. I only thought about you the whole time." He was staring into her eyes with a cocky smile on his face.

"Well I guess that's my queue to go. I'm gonna go check on Chibs. You _are _coming to dinner tonight?" Gemma waited for Selena to nod.

"Good. Be there at seven, you can help me cook." Gemma left the room smiling at them.

~SOA~

It was five-thirty, "You need to go get ready to go to Gemma's. Make sure I get extra servings."

She looked at him; they had lain in the same position all day, not moving except when the nurse came to check on him. "Are you sure, you'll be okay?"

He nodded, "Yeah, it's only a couple of hours and you'll be bringing back food. Can you also bring me some clothes for when I go home?"

She kissed him as she got up, "Yeah of course. See you in a few hours."

~SOA~

She stood in Juice's bedroom looking for a clean pair of jeans for him to wear. She looked around and realized she needed to clean this place, but she didn't want to erase his smell. She walked around picking up dirty clothes, placing them in a basket. She went into his laundry room, opened the washer only to discover even more clothes that consisted of mostly white t-shirts and jeans.

She sighed, found the detergent, and started the washer before showering. After she got out she stood in a towel, pulling clothes out and putting them in the dryer. She did her make-up while she waited for the clothes to finish.

She got three loads of clothes washed, dried and folded while she got dressed. She grabbed an empty duffel bag out of his closet and put two pairs of jeans, a white and a blue t-shirt, and boxers. She glanced in the mirror before leaving the house. She had decided on tight jeans and a simple white peasant blouse with her brown Timberlands.

She grabbed the duffel and left Juice's house. She popped the trunk and threw it in. She drove to Gemma's; it was six-fifty-nine when she got there. She walked in to see a couple of crow eaters in the kitchen along with Anita.

"Hey I thought you'd be here earlier?" Gemma was cutting up carrots.

"Sorry, Juice asked me to bring him clothes. I couldn't find any clean ones so I had to wash and dry some. I did three loads of laundry. I'm going to have to clean the whole house before he gets home…" She trailed off. All the women were giving her a look.

"What?" She asked as she popped a carrot into her mouth.

Gemma said with a smirk, "Well it seems like Juice has an Old Lady. Welcome to the club doll."

Selena started choking, "No that's … No I'm not." They were all looking at her with little smiles.

"Yeah you are. For one, you spent all day at the hospital with him cuddled up. Second, you have a key to his house. Third, you're doing his laundry. And finally you wuv him." The women laughed as Gemma completed her list.

"Shut up," it was said in a defeated voice; she knew Gemma was right. She started helping with dinner.

She was setting a dish down when Tara came in. Tara looked pissed, and Selena decided not to talk to her and headed back to help the others. She heard Gemma and Tara arguing; she looked at the other women who was looking anywhere but at the two women. Selena turned and looked when she heard Lyla's voice.

Damn, shit was blowing up tonight, and she began to think it might have been better to have stayed with Juice. After things calmed down just a little; Lyla came and stood with her after she had come back in with Opie. They were talking about what had been going on with Cara Cara since she has had left when Jax and the others came in. Apparently, Clay's group had almost died trying to get their stock back while Jax's almost died for the club; they started arguing and fighting.

She stood off to the side and wondered if this is what all the 'family' dinners were like. Selena turned toward the back door when she heard David's voice. Selena heard what he said but couldn't believe it. She and Lyla stared at each other with tears in their eyes. Luann couldn't be dead. Lyla hugged her and they stood holding on to each other as Clay and Jax started yelling at each other.

Selena and Lyla jumped when Gemma slammed the dish down on the table. After that everyone was somber and quiet. Selena was the first to move; she pushed Lyla into a seat, and grabbed a broom. Anita was right behind her, helping. No one was talking; as she cleaned up the broken dish Gemma grabbed her arm, "I'll do it."

Selena gave her a melancholy smile, "No I got it. Sit. I'll clean this up and then we can get the kids fed."

Everyone nodded and started moving. The guys sat not looking at each other. Selena finished, washed her hands and started making Kenny and Ellie's plates. Opie smiled at her and nodded. Selena and the crow eaters ended up making everyone's plate. Selena sat down beside Ellie; they were eating but not talking, "So how's school going?"

She asked trying to make it a little less tense in the room. Ellie smiled at her, "it's okay. I have a book report due and I don't know what to pick."

Selena swallowed her food, "Well there's always Harry Potter, Percy Jackson or something like that."

Ellie nodded at her, "Yeah I haven't read those, have you?" Selena knew everyone was watching or listening to the conversation.

"Yeah of course. While I was in Iraq I had nothing better to do half the time. My Tia would send them to me." She smiled, "Actually I still have them in storage. If you want, I can bring them to you."

Ellie nodded at her, "Thanks. What's a Tia?" Selena chuckled.

"Tia is aunt in Spanish; my aunt's her name is Maria, but I've always called her Tia." She glanced at Gemma, who was slightly smiling at them.

"So you're Mexican?" Tig asked. Happy and Jax both glared at him. Selena frowned at him.

"I'm half Mexican and half white." This piqued Gemma's interest.

"How'd that happen?" She took a bite of roast. Selena looked over at Ellie and Kyle.

"I don't think that's an appropriate conversation given the company." Everyone frowned at her except for Happy.

"Why is it inappropriate? I mean it's just how you were made…" Tig trailed off and looked away. "Shit. That's messed up."

Happy nodded, "It happens." Selena shrugged. She knew the story, her father and grandmother had told her but the man had raised her. He never did anything to her. If anything, he treated her better than her brothers until he kicked her out.

Everyone else looked lost and Tig decided to change topics, "So Selena, when are you going to get the crow eater mark?"

She gave him the 'fuck-I-look-like' look, "I'm not a crow eater." There were scuffs around the table. "So sleeping with a Son marks me as a crow eater?"

Tig pointed his fork at her, "Yeap. You know if you and Juice don't work out, you'll just find you another Son and my arms are wide open."

There were grins around the table now. She laughed. "What, you think you and Juice'll last?" Opie asked.

"No, I don't think we'll last. Nothing lasts. One Son is enough, and besides, I like my men a little more law abiding." That got laughs.

"So what you're saying is Juice is your first criminal?" Bobby asked. Selena shook her head.

"No, he's not, my first but I learned from a young age that's not what I want. I promised myself at sixteen I was done with dru- criminals." She shrugged.

Opie looked at her, "That's pretty young to decide something like that." She shrugged again.

"Yeah, well, you see some of the stuff I saw at that age, you would have done the same. I mean, it's not like it's keeping me from being with Juice." Gemma chuckled.

"He has to have something special right? And just happens that Juice has it. Well sorry Tig, Selena's off the market." Selena shook her head at Gemma's comment.

"No I mean eventually he'll get bored and I intend on moving back to Oakland sometime soon. I want to go to school and I need to help my Tia out." Gemma was giving her a look.

Happy asked, "So you're from Oakland? You do anything other than be a good girl?"

"Please. I have didn't have time to be bad. I boxed in high school and I was also a cheerleader." Ellie looked up at her.

"You were a cheerleader?" Selena nodded. "Yeap. Cheerleader, drama club, honor roll, and homecoming court."

"You really were a good girl." Tara said, and everyone laughed.

"Yeah. It was either that or join a gang and the nuns were harder on the gang members. Nuns scare the shit out of me." She shivered.

"You went to Catholic school?" Tig asked, which caused a chorus of "No"s from the table.

Selena laughed, "Born and raised Catholic, so I ended up going to Catholic school for 13 years. I've been hit with a ruler more times than I can count. I've had to say thousands of Hail Marys."

Tig groaned. Selena laughed as he said, "You are a heartless bitch."

The tension was gone now and the conversation had picked up. Selena leaned back in her chair, closing her eyes. She knew she had over-shared, but it had relaxed everyone. Dinner wrapped up and people left. Selena made Juice two plates and was helping one of the crow eaters clean up.

"Hey can I talk to you for a minute?" Gemma asked Selena. The crow eater left and Selena frowned.

"You're an old lady now; Tara gets the same respect. You know you almost gave yourself away tonight?" Selena exhaled and nodded.

"Yeah I know. I was trying to help." She rinsed the plate she held and placed it in the drainer, not looking at Gemma.

"And you did, but you have to watch what you say from now on Selena. Go on and head back to Juice." Selena nodded dried her hands and headed out. "Oh and by the way, Happy would be happy to give you your tattoo."

She got back to the hospital, she left his bag in the car, and took him his plates of food. She avoided the nurses' desk and headed back to Juice's room. She pushed opened the door and found him half asleep. He yawned as he looked over at her, "yes."

He pushed himself up in the bed, "Thanks babe." He unwrapped the food and took the fork she handed him. He started shoveling food into his mouth.

She leaned back in the chair and started fidgeting with her blouse, "Tig asked me when I was going to get a crow eater tattoo?"

He swallowed his mouthful of food, "You don't have to. He was probably just being an ass. He says shit like that all the time, so don't worry about it."

She kept her eyes on her lap, "Do you want me to get a crow eater tattoo?" She glanced up at him.

"It doesn't matter what I want. It's your body, Selena." He picked up eating again, occasionally glancing at her out the corner of his eye.

She nodded at him, "So Hale came by dinner tonight and said Luann was found beaten to death."

Juice swallowed, "No shit. Are you okay?"

She nodded, "Yeah. She was a friend, but when you've been in war you learn you lose people and you have to accept it and move on or you can never live."

"Okay Shakespeare. But really how are you?" She exhaled and smiled at him.

"I'm okay Juice, I swear. Eat." She smiled at him.

~SOA~

She was sitting on the bed playing with his hand when there was a knock at the door, "Come in."

They watched as Bobby and Jax walked in together, "Hey Juice. Selena can you give us a minute?"

She nodded and slid off the bed, "Yeah of course." As she was walking out she turns and asked, "One thing though, what happened?"

Bobby looked at Jax and shrugged, "Cara Cara burned down." Her face went blank and she took a breath.

"Shit. It just keeps coming. I'll be down in the cafeteria. Call me when you're done." She walked out.


	6. Lost and Not Found or Abel Gone

_Selena_

Lock down. She stood with Juice in the parking lot waiting for Jax and Tara. His arms were around her waist. Her hands were in his back pockets, "Are those my underwear? If you keep taking them I'm not going to have any."

He laughed, "That's fine by me. I like when you ain't got underwear on." She hit him lightly.

"That's because you're the one that's taken them off." He kissed her and moaned in the back of his throat.

"Damn straight. They're here." He let go of her and ran off toward the Cutlass. She followed behind to help Tara.

She took the baby bag as Tara got Abel out of the car. "Hey, how are you doing?" Tara shrugged and pulled the baby out.

"As good as anyone I guess. How about you? This has to be new to you?" It was Selena's turn to shrug.

"Not really. I'm use to lock downs but it wasn't this secure you know?" Tara smiled at her.

"Yeah lucky you." Tara shook her head and started toward the clubhouse. Selena knew the kids would be here and she remember the box of books she had got out of storage for Ellie.

She headed to her Dodge Charger and popped the trunk. The box had slid toward the back, she leaned into the trunk to get the box and she saw it. She gasped grabbed the box and slammed the trunk. Fuck it was still back there. She looked around no one was looking at her. She picked up the box and head in feeling very paranoid. She found Lyla and the kids.

"Hey baby," Lyla smiled up at her. "I brought those books for Ellie." She placed them on the floor and then sat beside her.

"How are you and Opie?" Lyla shrugged and looked around for the man before answering her.

"We're okay I guess." Lyla gave her a weak smile before Clay started talking. He finished.

"Hey Ellie I brought you those books and a few other things." Ellie walked over and started going through the box. She pulled out all seven Harry Potters and a couple of Percy Jackson's. Some of them came out with sand and a few were burned looking. Selena picked up the first Harry Potter; its cover was missing and there were black places on it. "I got blown up with this."

Lyla and Ellie both looked at her, "It was a small IED and I was a good 10 feet from it no damage just burnt things."

Ellie pulled out a length of cloth, "What's this?" The cloth was linen and black. Selena took it from her.

"It a Hijab which is just a headscarf. I wore it when I was overseas. You want to try it?" Ellie shook her head as Piney walked by going to the chapel.

"Traitor. You should have walked around with your head bare, no covering." He grumbled.

"Yeah so I could have been shot no thanks old man." He waddled off to the chapel shaking his head and mumbling. The women laughed.

"Thanks Selena." Ellie walked off taking the box with her. Selena leaned back into the couch and sighed.

Lyla picked up her hand and patted it, "Relax. They'll handle it." Selena nodded before leaving the couch.

She walked across the club to the bar greeting Gemma with a kiss on the cheek, "Hi Gemma." Gemma smiled at her.

"Hey honey. You smell like Juice." Tara looked at her and Selena smiled shaking her head and sat beside Tara.

"I don't know how I should take that but I think Juice smells yummy." This made Gemma laugh and Tara look uncomfortable.

"I bet you do. No I'm just sayin' it obvious your all about that." Gemma nodded at her with a small grin.

"Yeah well. The others are taken and the only one tryin' to push up on this is Tig." She was being sarcastic.

"You and Tig?" Tara asked in shock while Gemma laughed at Selena's you've-got-to-be-fucking-kidding-me face.

"No I'm on the Juice and I can't stop." Gemma laughed and shook her head while Tara frowned.

"Do you say that to him while you're in bed?" Gemma was grinning and chuckling at her. Selena shook her head.

"No we don't really talk much. He's more of an action kind of guy. Hi, thanks." A croweater had brought her a cup of coffee both women looked at her. "What?"

"Nothing. So is he any good?" Gemma leaned over Tara and asked in a whispered tone.

"Gemma." Tara sounded outraged.

"What? I want to know." Selena laughed at her and nodded. "Share."

"He is better than good." She pulled aside her low cut shirt to show them a hicky on her chest. "He's got kinks but I like them except for him stealing my underwear all the time." Gemma laughed at her as Half-Sack came up.

"Hey can I get your help with something?" She nodded and smiled at the girls before sliding off the stool.

~SOA~

She was helping him fix a car when Piney came out with Gemma and Tara, "Hey half-sack go with them."

"Okay," He glanced at Selena who smiled at the man. "Let me just get my stuff." He walked to the office.

"You wanna come?" Gemma asked her with slight smile.

"No, I'll finish up some stuff around here." She turned and walked away from them feeling just a little lost.

~SOA~

She stood with him. They were going to meet up with the Aryans and he was acting like it wasn't a big deal. "I'll be okay babe. You'll see." He kissed her.

"It better be or you're a dead man Juan Carlos." He winced at his name and kissed her before heading to the van. She walked toward the clubhouse and watched as they left. Gemma kissed her head and pushed her toward the door.

She sat with Ellie helping with the girl with her book report before she went to help with dinner. She had butterflies in her stomach and jumped when Gemma touched her shoulder, "Hun you can't worry yourself like this. He'll be okay, all of them will."

Selena sighed and looked at Ellie who was placing her paper in her bag. She hugged Selena, "Thanks."

She smiled as the girl walked off to be with her brother. Gemma nudged her, "You and Juice, gonna make one of those?"

"What? A kid? No." She pushed away from the table and headed for the kitchen with Gemma right behind her.

"Please. I see the why you look at Abel. You want one it. It's okay you a grown woman and you're in a relationship." She shook her head at Gemma.

She turned and faced her, "Gemma I don't think Juice wants a kid right now or ever. So it's not going to happen."

Gemma placed her hands on her hips, "Do you use protection every time you two have sex? Are you on birth control?" Gemma watched the girls face. "No, so it could happen."

Selena glared at the woman as she left and one of the Crow Eaters that was standing beside her said, "She's right doll."

~SOA~

She had fallen asleep at the bar waiting for Juice. Someone touch her back, "Sweetie come on they're at the police station come on."

She looked at Gemma, "They get arrested again?" Gemma and Tara looked at her. Lyla frowned at her.

"Well well look who's an old lady." Gemma chuckled at her. "Common let's go check on our guys."

She rode with Gemma and Tara to the police station. She saw him first and nobody else. He was sitting on his Dyna. She got out of the Cutlass. He saw her and he gave her that stupid ass grin, "Hey baby."

"Awe look at you." She touched his face. "Are you okay?" She heard Gemma snicker and glared at her.

"Yeah baby I'm okay." He kissed her. "I told you I would be. You didn't have to come down." He wrapped his whole body around it seemed like.

"Aye ya didn't have ta come down now who ah'm supposed ta cuddle with?" Chibs said. She chuckled at him.

"I'm glad you're okay too Filip." He smiled at her and stuck his tongue out at Juice.

"Told ya da lass loves me." Chibs crossed his arms over his chest. "Once she's done with ya she'll come ta meh."

Juice held on to her tighter, "The fuck she will go find your own. This one is mine." The whole club started laughing.

Juice and Chibs sat on the hood of a cop car and Selena stood between Juice's legs waiting for news.

"Look at this. What I'm I going to do with you?" He took her hands in his and kissed them.

"You going to care for my wounds after this is over baby." She raised an eyebrow at him. "Come on you know what I mean."

She kissed him anyway while Chibs chuckled at them, Unser came out. Juice and Chibs hopped up the steps. She hung back just a little. As Jax gave Half-sack orders to stay with Tara and Gemma she noticed Juice catch half-sack's eye and pointed at her.

~SOA~

"I'll take him Tara." Selena said. Tara handed Abel to her and she put him in his car seat. She was making faces at him.

She heard Gemma say, "I'm driving." Gemma got in the driver's seat. Tara and Selena looked at each other with concern.

Tara asked who that girl was and as Gemma answered Selena got a sense of dread. She didn't think this was going to end well at all for either party. Gemma started to follow Zobelle's daughter. They followed her to a neighborhood. Selena was getting the sense that someone was going to die.

Tara was trying to talk Gemma out of doing something crazy but Selena knew how a rape victim feels. Selena wasn't going to talk the woman out of it.

"I love you Tara. I'm glad you're with my boy. I love you too Selena take care of them." Selena nodded let out a breath as Gemma got out and Tara moved to the driver's side.

~SOA~

She helped Tara get in the house and was entertaining Abel while Tara put stuff away. The door opened, "Jax?"

"No it's just me." Half-sack walked in the door waved at her and looked worried.

Tara asked, "Where's Gemma?" Selena looked from Tara to Half-Sack feeling her heart drop to the floor.

"I don't know feds raided the house. I had to leave." He looked scared.

"Shit," Both women said it at the same time. Selena looked at Tara as she walked across the room.

"Better call Jax." Half-sack said. Tara went for the phone. Selena patted Half-sack's back.

"You did right. It's okay. If you had gotten caught we wouldn't have known." He smiled at her.

Tara was on the phone to Jax when Cameron came it with a gun. Tara gasped, Half-Sack didn't move but Selena took a step toward the baby.

"Weapon." Half-sack handed over his gun to the Irish man while Tara sat down at the table. Selena took another step toward Abel.

"Why are you doing this?" Tara asked the man. After that everything happened so fast; Selena didn't comprehend any of it. Cameron walked toward the baby and was holding a knife to the baby and everyone moved toward him. He stabbed Half-Sack. Selena felt tears in her eyes but he main concern was the baby. Half-sack couldn't be helped. She watched as he picked up the baby.

"Don't do this please?" She asked. He pointed the gun at her. She held up her hands. He moved toward her.

"Find something ta tie her down with. GO!" He yelled and pointed the gun at Tara. Selena started opening drawers. She found duck tape.

"Get up. Move." Both women did as he said. The went to the nursery, "Sit." Tara sat in the rocker. "Tape her up. Her mouth too."

Selena did as she was told. She finished with tears running down her, "I'm sorry." She whispered to Tara.

"Let's go. Move." He put the gun in her back and they went out the back door to his car. "Get in." She did; he handed her the baby. She thought about running but knew with Abel in her arms she wouldn't get very far. They rode to the harbor.

"Out." She got out with Abel still in her arms. The only reason she wasn't losing her shit was because Abel needed her. They walked down the dock. "Get on. Sit." She did as she was told as he started the boat.

When she heard Jax's voice she cried and held on tighter to Abel. She wasn't crying for her she was crying for Jac, Abel, and Half-Sack.

~SOA~

She was feeling sick on her stomach and Abel was starting to get fussy, "We need to get him some formula soon are he'll start crying."

Cameron looked at her and nodded, "We're almost ther'. Try and keep him quiet." She nodded at the man. He docked the boat as he tied the boat down; Selena slipped off Abel's beanie and placed it so that Cameron couldn't see.

"Let's go girly. No games." He pulled her close and placed the gun in her side. "Dannae look so scared. Come now. Play along or ya'll be floatin' out ta sea." She nodded and smiled as they walked up the dock.

Abel started to cry, "Shhhh baby boy. I know." She bounced Abel as Cameron pushed her toward a car. He didn't have to say anything she got in and tried to get the boy to stop crying. He walked around the car and got it. He didn't say anything to her as they drove.

He stopped at a store, he reached in his pocket, "Take this and get tha boy a bottle and formula. Hand da boy ta me. We'll wait fer ya." He handed her some money.

She walked into the store. She thought about asking for help but she didn't know where she was and what if he left with the baby. She hurried through the store getting the supplies. She walked out of the store and release a breath he was still there.

She got in, "I got enough to last a few days." He handed the boy back to her and put the car in drive.

"Dat's all right we won't be her' long any way." He drove to a house, "Get in and make da boy a bottle."

She nodded. She walked in. There was a man sitting the couch. "Watch her. Ah'll be back in a couple of hours. She's gonna take care of the boy."

She winced as Cameron slammed the door. The man looked at her, "Give him to me." She did. She didn't have a choice. She went into the kitchen.

"Can I use a pan to sterilize the bottle and nipple?" The man walked in the kitchen she noticed he was a rough looking man but the way he handled Abel made him look soft.

"Yeah, go ahead but you best be quick about he's seems hungry." She nodded and went to work. She had Abel's bottle made in fifteen minutes. She reached for the boy, the man nodded at her, "I'll go get you some kind of cloth do not move." He pulled up his shirt to show her a gun. She nodded.

~SOA~

Ireland, he said. She was far from home and help but Abel was happy and healthy that was all that mattered to her. Cameron was pushing her up a set of steps with Abel in her arms. He knocked on a door, "Mother of Christ Camie what yer doin' her'?"

He pushed her in. The two women looked at each other, "Give him ta meh. Go make him a bottle." She did as she was told it was second nature now. She watched as the woman fed him. "There's some clothes dat might fit ya in the first room go change and den ya can sleep."

She woke up to the sound of Abel cooing; she looked around he wasn't in the room with her. She started to panic. She walked out to see Maureen holding him and a priest sitting across from her. "Who's dis?"

"Tha gurl he kidnapped when he took tha boy." The blond nodded at her. "She's not sharin' ha name."

"My child there's not reason ta be afraid." She looked at the father and then at the boy weighing her options.

"Yeah well let's see you're in with Cameron and Jimmy O. Father I think there is reason to be scared. Let me take the boy and we'll leave." She started to reach for Abel.

"Ah can't allow that right now. Things need to be dealt with ya'll be coming with meh deary."


	7. Saving Abel

**Author's notes I'm posting this without reading. This part of the story is completely AU. Thanks to you lovely people for reading and reviewing. Heart you forever. - Sparroe **

She sat there glaring at the man who had taken her from a member of SAMBEL. She was supposed to be safe with them. The Father had given her to a member for safe keeping. She knew the Father did it just to separate her from Abel but she didn't think he wanted her in Jimmy O's hands. He had taken her from the man without a fight and blind folded her before shoving her in a car.

The room stunk to high heaven of ammonia and mold. She tried to get slack in her ropes so she could slip out, "No ya dannae deary." He reached out to touch her; she strained to get away from his hands. "Aw come on. Ya know ya just pushing me away for da boy but Ah can show ya a real man."

He grabbed the hair at the crown of her head and pulled back, "Ah like when they try ta fight back. So go righ' ahead."

She glared at him and tightened her hands around the arms of the chair. "This is just temporary. When Ah get Abel ya gonna take care of him for meh."

She spit in his face. He backhanded her so hard her vision blurred and she felt her lip split. She spit on the floor, "You hit like a girl." This time when he hit her, the chair fell backwards.

"Dat gurl enough for ya. Get her up." Two of Jimmy's guys put the chair back on all four legs. "Clean her up. Ah have ta go pay a visit."

One of the younger men, his name was Damian, came with a first aid kit. "Why da ya hav' ta goad him?"

He took out an alcohol pad and started to clean on the cuts on her cheek from the last slap. She hissed as it stung her face, "Stop bein' a baby. Ya brought this on yaself."

He cleaned the cut and then placed a gauze pad with medical tape over it before cleaning up her lip. She watched the blue eyed boy try to be as gentle with her as possible, "Why are you work for him, Damian?"

"Ah no ya dannae doll. I'm not that dumb." She shook her head at him as he spoke.

"No Damian that's not what I mean. Why him? You could work with the Father?" She swallowed. Her head was feeling a little light and she was using him to concentrate.

"Nah Ah've known Jimmy since Ah was a wee one. He's taken care of meh and Ah've been just fine with working for him. Do ya think ya can eat today?" She shrugged as he closed the first aid kit and stood to leave.

She hadn't been able to eat for the last couple of days every time she did, it would come up. She licked her lip and winced the split was deep. She only pissed Jimmy off because it was all she could really do at this point. She was stuck here with no way out but death. She sighed as she watched the well-dressed brown haired man come back with a tray of food.

"It's only chicken broth and some crackers. Ah brought ya Apple Juice this time." He smiled at her and he untied her right wrist. He sat in a chair directly across from her. He was going to watch her eat and then take her to the bathroom afterwards.

She ate a cracker first and waited a bit; it stayed down and she picked up the mug of broth. She sipped and waited, it also stayed down. She finished and picked up the Apple Juice which caused her to start crying. She put it down and sobbed. She missed Juice so much she hadn't seen him in so long, it hurt.

Damian handed her a napkin. She thanked him before dabbing at her eyes, "Sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."

He padded her leg, "It's alright ya've had a rough time. Finish ya juice so ya can go to da restroom."

~SOA~

She doesn't know how long Jimmy's had her; nights blended into days and minutes into hours. She had fallen asleep in the chair when she heard a baby crying. _No_, she thought, _please don't be Abel_. She opened her eyes to see Jimmy walking toward her with a baby.

"Untie her." Damian started on the ropes; he made a quick job of them. "Get up." She did as she was told. "Take care of him." He passed Abel to her. Her arms automatically reached for him. She pulled him in and started to sooth him. "Ye'll make a great ma." Jimmy was looking at her in a creepy way that had her taking a step back. "Watch her Damian. Get her whatever she needs for da boy and take her upstairs ta da rooms."

"Come on." Damian placed his hand on her back. He knew her legs were weak but with Abel in her arms she knew she had to protect him this time. She wouldn't let him go ever again.

"I need sterile bottles, formula, and diapers." She told Damian as he guided them up the steps to a red door. He opened it and inside was a bed, a sink and a toilet. He nodded at her as she sat on the bed with Abel.

She laid Abel on the bed and just looked at him. He had grown so much since the last time she had seen him. She smiled down at the boy with relief. He was healthy thank god. He was pulling at the socks on his feet when Damian spoke, "Ah'm going ta relay what ya need ta someone. Ah'm gonna lock this door."

She just nodded as she examined the boy for any little scratch or bump. She felt the tears build in her eyes and blinked them away.

~SOA~

Abel was a sleep on the bed. She stood in front of the mirror holding up her shirt. She had lost weight since this all began but her stomach wasn't flat anymore. She had been sick and nauseous for a while now. She gasped as it finally hit her; there was a knock on the door, she dropped her shirt and said, "Come in."

It was Jimmy O, "Get da baby let's go." She did as she was told. She settled the sleeping boy against her chest. Jimmy smiled at her, "Ah'm going ta miss our little talks."

She didn't say anything not with Abel in her arms. "So ya not going ta talk ta meh? Dats fine. Get in the car."

She did and slid over so he could get in. They rode in silence for a while. Selena took in the night with a feeling of skepticism. It had been a while since she's even smelled the outdoors.

"Are ya cold? Damian give Selena yer jacket." Damian handed back his jacket to Jimmy. Jimmy waited for her to lean up and then wrapped it around her shoulders. "Dats better."

He kept smiling at her as they rode down streets she didn't know. "Yer going home look happy."

She didn't react. "I'll believe it when I step foot on American soil." Jimmy laughed at her.

"Smart lass." The car stopped, "Stay here till Ah call ya." He got out and walked out. She didn't even look at who he was talking to. Damian tapped on the window and she got out of the car.

Damian walked over to Jimmy with her. She felt like crying when she saw it was Jax standing there. Damian stopped her from walking straight to Jax. The men discussed something and then the switch happened. Damian pushed her toward Jax and she watched as the Father walked toward Jimmy.

Jax took Abel from her and they watched Jimmy leave. Jax looked at her, "Selena. Thank god you're here." He pulled her toward him and just held onto the both of them. "Come let's get you back."

~SOA~

She had fallen asleep on the ride to Maureen's place. Jax had he arm wrapped around her shoulders. After Jimmy had left Jax had turned to her, "We thought you were dead. We didn't even know you were in Ireland till Jimmy let it slip to mom."

She just shook her head, "I know can we go?" He nodded and pulled her into the car.

She felt him shake her, "Come on we're here." She sat up and looked around she saw nothing but walls and darkness. "Come on."

She got out and walked behind Jax up a flight of stairs. He open the door and she heard Gemma gasp, "Abel."

"I got back more than just than Abel." Selena stood behind Jax holding on to the back of his jacket. He stepped aside and the next thing she knew a bear of a man had her wrapped in his arms.

She started crying as Opie put her down. He moved back as others moved forward to hug her. The last one was Juice. He wrapped her in his arms. Once she was in his arms and got to breathe him in. She felt at home. Her brain shut down and her body gave up. Juice caught her as she fell into the blackness of her mind.

~SOA~

She woke up to being spooned. She was using a very toned arm for a pillow while she held the other arm against her chest. She groaned as she turned over to look at the face of the man holding her.

He was grinning at her, "How are you feeling this morning?" She snuggled into him. He laughed as she hid her face in his neck.

"I'm okay. Tried but I'm okay. What happened?" She kissed his neck working her way up to his jawline.

"You passed out. When we get back you're going to the doctor." She nodded as she made her way to his lips.

"I've missed you." She kissed him.

_Juice_

No one was speaking just looking at each other, staring into space or drinking beer. They were waiting for Jax to get back from his meeting with Jimmy O. He was on his third beer when they heard the door open. Jax entered with Abel.

Gemma was the first one to move or speak, "Abel." She took him from Jax and just held onto him.

Jax smiled at them, "I got back more than just Abel." He moved over and there stood Selena. She had on her Tims, jeans and a man's blazer. Her face was bruised, her lip split and there was a bandage over her right cheek. He was in shock but Opie wasn't he jumped up and wrapped the woman in his arms.

He stood and watched as his brothers hugged her. He saw that she never really looked up at the people around her like she thought it wasn't real. He waited for Chibs to release her before taking her in his arms.

She felt so thin and she didn't smell like his Selena anymore. He felt her fist clench his jacket and heard her sobbing. Then her body went slack and he caught her. He carried her bridal style into the room Maureen showed him. He laid her on the bed and walked back out.

"We need a doctor." He stated to the room. "Is there anyone you trust or a place I can take her?"

Maureen shook her head, "No not one ah can think of. Like meh call one of the others Ah'm sure they know a doc or two."

He went back into the room and took the blazer off of her only to find more bruising on her wrist. He wanted to hit something or someone, his hands clenched. He took a breath and removed the bandage on her cheek. Underneath it was a huge gash that looked deep enough for stitches but it was already healing. He kissed her forehead.

He was watching her sleep when there was a knock on the doctor. Chibs opened the door and in walked a red haired man with Gemma and Abel behind him.

Gemma spoke first, "This is Doctor O'Malley. He's here to look at Selena. I'll stay with her." Juice nodded. He understood and left the room with Chibs.

He started pacing and Chibs just watched him for a few minutes before placing a hand on his chest, "Go outside and smoked something. Ya making meh anxious."

Juice stopped pacing and leaned against the wall staring at the door. He doesn't remember how long he stared at that door but eventually it opened.

The doctor walked out and shook Chibs hand and then Juice's, "She'll be aight. From what Ms. Morrow said she's been through some things. Her body has been stressed for weeks and the baby hasn't helped with that stress Ah'm sure. Ah gave Gemma some vitamins and she'll need ta rest."

Juice and Chibs both stared at the small man, "Did you say baby?" Juice grabbed Chibs' arm for support.

"Yes da lass is almost three months along. Excuse meh. Have a nice day." The men stared at each other before Juice's face broke out into a grin.

Chibs hugged the boy and both started laughing. "What's going on?" Opie asked. The men turned toward them.

"Juicy's gonna be a father." The men started patting him on the back and just being loud in general.

Gemma walked out looking pissed, "Okay I get but she needs to rest. The doc said she's fine to fly back with us just give a few more hours to sleep.

The guys followed Gemma out but Juice went into the room. She was under the covers and she was frowning. He stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed with her. He slid in behind her and pulled her into his chest and just held her until he fell asleep.


	8. Age

**Juice is 34 years old at this point. Somebody sent me proof of his age. AU Didn't read through once again sorry but if I do I'm going to second guess myself. -Sparroe**

_Juice_

They were back home and at the clubhouse. He was watching as Lyla hugged Selena. He was glad when she smiled at Lyla because half the time she looked in a daze and lost. He felt helpless looking at her sometimes. He felt someone beside him, "She'll be fine; I'll watch her. You just help Jax get Tara back."

He smiled and nodded at Gemma, "Thanks." He walked up behind Selena and kissed her neck, "You're home, we're having a baby and I love you."

She turned in his arms, "Did you just say you love me?" She smiled up at him like he was an angel or something.

"Yeah I did. I love you Selena Fox." He kissed her lips. They stood there wrapped up each other for a little while longer before he heard his name being called.

He was jogging toward the clubhouse when he heard, "Hey?" He turned and looked back at her in his shirt, a pair of Trinity's jeans and her Tims.

"What?" He stared at her as she walked toward him with a smirk on her face. She grabbed a fist full of his jacket.

"I love you too Juan Carlos Ortiz." She kissed him and then pushed him toward the clubhouse.

_Selena_

She walked inside; she felt so old now and out of place. She walked in; sighing as she looked around at the clubhouse and realized that Kip wasn't here. She knew Gemma saw her gasp and grab the bar. She felt the tears slide down her cheeks; she felt arms wrap around her holding her up, "Come on let's get you cleaned up."

It was Gemma. She led Selena down the hall to Juice's room. Gemma opened the door and pushed her over the threshold, "You were fine just a minute ago. What happened?"

She sobbed out, "Where's Kip?" She saw Gemma's confusion through her tears, "Half-sack."

"Oh honey, they didn't tell you." Selena shook her head. "He's dead baby. Shhh there was nothing you could do. I know shhhhh."

Gemma held her until the tears stopped, "Come on Selena let's get you cleaned up and in some clothes that fit."

~SOA~

She felt someone sit on the bed, "Sorry we didn't tell you about Half-sack. I guess I thought you'd been through enough and now with Tara missing, I didn't want to add to the stress."

She sighed and rolled over looking at Juice. "It's okay I understand but it would have been nice to know. Juice, it hurt seeing him get stabbed then coming back and realizing I had been lying to myself the whole time."

He wiped away a tear from her cheek, "I know. Do you want me to take you home?"

She sat up, "Don't you have to go help find Tara?" She frowned at him.

"Yeah but they have to do some stuff first. Come on. You'll feel better at home and Meth missed you." She allowed him to pull her to the edge of the bed. She watched as he put her boots on.

"Juice I'm not going to break." She leaned against his back with her chin on his shoulder while he tied her boots.

"I know. I just want to take care of you while I can, you know?" She nodded and kissed his cheek as he finished putting on her boots.

~SOA~

She lay on their bed with Meth and a hand on her stomach. Juice had left almost as soon as they got here. She had walked into the house touching everything, "Babe I got to go."

She just nodded as he kissed her and left. She heard Meth at the back door wanting in. She sniffed the air, it smelt like Juice, home, and safety. She smiled as she walked through the kitchen to the backdoor. Meth barked when he heard the lock turn. She opened it and the white and black pit almost bowled her over.

She walked down the hall with Meth following behind her. She opened the door to their bedroom and looked around; nothing had been moved since she left. His clothes were still on the floor. Her heels were in the middle of the floor and her jacket was on the back of the rocking chair. She frowned over the fact that Juice hadn't been in this room since she had been taken.

"Well boy at least you got fed, huh?" The dog jumped on the bed and lay across Juice's side. "You know he's not going to put up with that Papi."

She crawled into the bed without taking her shoes off. She and Meth laid there in peace and quiet.

She had fallen asleep, "Move mutt. Hey Selena come wake up baby." She mumbled and tried to roll over, "Babe Jax found her." This woke her up. She looked over at the grinning man.

"Was she okay?" He nodded and he got off the bed pulling her with him. She slid across the mattress.

"Yeah, Jax took her to the hospital and that's where I'm taking you." She mumbled as he put Meth out the backdoor and dragged her out the front.

"I don't want to. I want to sleep and eat." She knew she sounded like a child but she didn't want to leave the bed or the house where she felt the safest.

He wrapped his arms around her, "I know baby but we gotta get you checked out, should've done it when we got back."

~SOA~

Her hands were shaking as they entered the building. He was the last person she thought she would ever see. Why was Marcus here? She looked at Juice but knew better than to ask. He took her hand as the headed to the desk.

He looked back at her frowning, "I'm okay just worried." He nodded as he spoke to the nurse.

"Fill these out and then we'll take you back, okay?" The nurse smiled at them and Selena thought at least it's not that other bitch.

"Here I'll do it." She gave him the clipboard. "First name: Selena. Middle Initial:" he looked at her waiting for an answer.

"A." She looked away from him knowing he was going to ask what it stood for. She heard him write it down.

"What does the A stand for?" She looked at him and his open face and knew she couldn't lie to him.

"Álvarez. It's my father's last name." He just nodded and went back to the paper work. She frowned at him and wondered if he was ignoring it or didn't put it together.

"Last Name: Fox. DOB:" He looked at her waiting for an answer. She sighed at him and realized this was going to take forever.

"October 31st, 1988. I'm 24." His face was laughable. His mouth had dropped open and he was staring at her.

"Shit." He ran his hand over his face. He put the clipboard down and wrapped his arms around her. They sat there for a while before they heard a cough. They turned to look at Jax and Tara.

Tara was smiling at her. She stood up and hugged the woman, "I'm so glad you're okay." Tara said.

"Me? What about you?" Selena asked as they pulled away from each other. "Congratulations by the way."

"Thanks, what are you guys doing here?" Tara asked as Jax wrapped his arms around Tara's waist.

Juice stepped up, "We need to get Selena checked out. The Irish doc just looked her over and I want to see the baby before I go away."

Tara and Jax both blinked at them, "You're pregnant?" Jax asked as a smirk crossed his face.

"Um yeah the Irish doc said I was almost three months." Tara hugged her again while Jax patted Juice on the back.

"Come on I'll get you in a room and sat up." Tara pulled her away from the men who had started talking.

_Juice_

"Congrats man that's awesome." Juice smiled at the blonde man before it slipped and he sank down in one of the waiting room chairs.

"Dude, she's only 24 and she's already been through so much shit. I don't know if I can put her through this." He placed his face in his hands.

He felt Jax sit down beside him, "I think she can handle it. Shit looked at what she went through with Abel. She's tough, man. Have you seen her and Opie argue? She may be young but she's fierce."

Juice laughed. "Dude there is a 10 year difference. What if I'm not the right guy for her? I mean really, I'm not ready to get married and I'm not ready to be a father but I'm going to step up cause that kid's mine."

Jax smiled at him, "She's smart and if she didn't want to be with you she wouldn't be here. Let her decide not you."

They watched as a nurse came toward them, "Mr. Ortiz. Doctor Knowles and your wife are ready."

Jax and he followed the nurse down the hall to a small room. The nurse knocked before opening the door and allowing them to go in. The first thing he saw was Selena laying on a table with her shirt up and blue paper tucked in the top of her pants.

"Hey," He kissed Selena who smiled up at him. "How was the initial check?" He looked at Tara.

"Everything looked good. We took some blood and they are going to run some tests on it, she needs to drink more water but other than that she's healthy. You wanna see your baby?"

"Hell Yeah." They chuckled at him. He picked up Selena's hand as Tara put gel on her stomach and the rubbed the wand around it.

Juice stared at the screen as they heard a sound and saw the gray blur on the screen. Tara pointed at the screen, "This is your baby's heart. This circle is the baby."


	9. Baby

**Mostly AU.**

_Juice _

Waking up to a girl who isn't a Crow Eater has its advantages. You know she isn't there because of who you run with. She doesn't care that your dog is lying on her feet or that there's a gun on the nightstand. She doesn't ask you what's it like to kill people or can you take her for a ride. She smiles at you as you spoon her; she laughs when you start whispering in her ear and tells you its too early for that.

She doesn't push you a way as you kiss her or tell you it's going to cost you. She doesn't say baby the whole time like she doesn't know your name. She whispers that she loves you and knows your real name not your nickname. Best about waking up to a girl who's not a Crow Eater is that's she's having your baby.

~SOA~

The sun was shining in the blinds; he grumbled and pulled Selena closer so he could hide his face in her hair. He felt her kiss his chest and try to pull away. He tightened his grip, "Just a little bit longer."

She sighed but snuggled back down with him. He felt her tracing patterns in his stomach, "If you keep doing that it's going to be a long time before you leave this bed."

She laughed, "We have to get to that breakfast, brunch thing. So either you make it quick or we do this in the shower."

She laughed as she left the bed and headed for the bathroom. He blinked at her and then looked down at Meth, "Damn, I really do love her."

~SOA~

He was sitting at a table eating and trying to feed Selena but she was shaking her head, "I'm not eating that. No I don't like Brussels sprouts quit."

"How are you supposed to get our kid to eat this stuff if you won't?" He frowned at her as Filthy Phil laughed. "Just eat one."

She opened her mouth so he could feed her, "See it ain't so bad." He watched as she chewed and made a face.

"That shit is nasty. My kid ain't eating that." Juice shook his head at the woman before him.

He was about to tell her well to bad when Opie spoke up and said Lyla had something to say. "We're getting married."

They got up to congratulate the couple, "Dude your making me look bad." Opie laughed at him.

_Selena_

She smiled at Lyla as she looked at the ring, "It's beautiful." The three women looked at her.

Gemma raised an eyebrow at her, "When are you and Juice going to make it official?" Her eyes widen at the woman.

"JUICE!" She turned, zigzagged through people before she made it to the door of the clubhouse. "Shit."

She hated that question and wasn't going to answer it. Only the club and the old ladies knew about the baby. She wasn't the marrying kind, hell she wasn't really the mommy type until she met Abel.

She headed out across the lot to sit on the swing set the prospects had built. She was kicking her feet against the ground. She felt a shadow cross her, "What's going on in that head of yers?"

She looked at Chibs, "I don't know. I guess it's a shock going from thinking I was going to die to having to take care of Abel to waking up beside Juice. It's been hard but I'm trying to be happy for him before he goes away you know."

Chibs bumped her, "Dannae do that. Tell him what's going on. He loves ya even if he dannae tell ya."

She smiled at the Scotsman, "He said it yesterday." She looked away from him embarrassed. "We um talked about god-fathers too. I'm Catholic and um I was going to ask if you wanted to be the um god-father?"

She rushed through her next sentaces, "If you don't want to it's okay I'll ask Opie. I mean I understand that….." He placed a gentle hand over her mouth.

"Of courses Ah'll be da babes' god-father." He smiled at her. "What else was they going ta call meh, grandda?"

She shrugged, "I don't know. Uncle Chibi?" She laughed and he smiled at the woman who had brought a light to Juice's eyes.

"Well Ah've got ta be heading out. Ya talk ta him ya hear?" He squeezed her shoulder and waited for her nodded.

~SOA~

She watched as the boys pulled into the garage. She waited for them to settle before going to Juice. She thought about how she had avoided the Cutlass which she knew to hold Jimmy and shivered. "You okay?"

"Yeah just being this close to Jimmy…" He wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back.

"I know baby. It won't be much longer, okay?" She nodded and kissed him before going to stand in front of the office door. She watched as the feds pulled in. She realized this was it juice was going away.

She watched as the guys pulled Jimmy out of the trunk. She walked toward Lyla and they stood together watching as everything exploded around them. She watched as Stahl ousted Jax as a rat and the men get mad and go for him. Juice and she had their good byes earlier before they left to go get Jimmy.

She noticed that he glanced over at she give him a sad smile and a wave. The shoved him onto the car. She looked away; she couldn't bear to see him being manhandled. Gemma was crying and she knew a few tears slipped out as well.

She felt Lyla's hand on her shoulder as they watch the men get loaded into the van. Gemma was worried about Jax being killed for being a rat but Selena was afraid for all of them, they were her family. The doors closed and they pulled out of the lot.

Gemma hugged her, "Come on. You can stay with me." She smiled at Gemma and clasped the woman's arms.

"I've got to go take care of Meth. Gemma I'll be okay. You-you go on home I'll be over there later."

~SOA~

She had fed Meth and they were on the couch watching Alcatraz when she heard a knock on the door. She opened it, "Hey can I come in?"

"Um yeah do you want a beer?" Opie patted Meth on the head before sitting on the table in front of where she had been sitting.

"No sit." She did. He heart was beating through her chest. "We need to talk. When you went missing I searched your car." She paled as he spoke. "If you can explain I won't go to the club. I won't put Juice through what I went through. Tell me the truth, Selena."

"Whatever you decide it needs to what until after the baby." Opie nodded at her. "What did you do with it?"

He sighed, "I have it hidden somewhere. Selena I wouldn't hurt your child okay if I have to go to the club it'll be after the baby's born now talk before I start assuming things."

She took a breath. "It's my brother's cut. I took it from him after I helped him leave the state the night the guys got out of prison."

He nodded, "Tig said you had come in acting funny. Why did you help your brother leave and why did he leave without his cut?"

"He wanted out and he had stolen money from my father. I thought he was still family but he's not. It's just a man who happens to be blood that night when I helped him was the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life Opie. I realized I could lose what I had here for a man who refused to help me."

She had tears in her eyes and Opie squeezed her knee, "What do you mean refused to help you?"

She looked straight into Opie's eyes and said the words that could end her life. "My father is Marcus Álvarez." She watched as he stood up and walked away from her with his hands on his head.

"So you mean you're the daughter of the fucking president of the god-damn Mayans?" He growled at her.

"Yes but he disowned me when I was 18. I'm not his daughter anymore. Opie I haven't spoken to him since my 18th birthday when he screamed at me to get out of his house. Opie the only reason I helped my brother was because I thought I still cared about him. I don't. This is my family." She was sobbing now.

She felt Opie beside her and then his arms around her, "Ssshhhhh. We all make mistakes. It's okay. Ssshhh. Does Juice know?"

"I don't know. When we went to the doctor the other day, I told him my name is Selena Álvarez Fox. I don't know if he noticed or not." Opie rubbed her back.

"You need to tell him and I'll talk to the club because if this gets out. You will be in trouble. I'll let you tell Juice first." She and Opie sat on the couch. He was there because she was still hiccupping and sniffling and he couldn't leave her like that.

~SOA~

She was four months along when they let her in to see Juice. They had searched her thoroughly, "Hey you wanna watch your hands?"

"Sorry miss. She's clear. Let her through." The guard just grinned at her as she went past him.

She sat at a table waiting for them to bring Juice out. She watched as they opened the gate and as Juice came through. He had a huge grin on his face as he sat down.

"Hey babe. Hey baby." She smiled as he touched her belly. "I got the sonogram pictures. The boys said it doesn't look like me."

She laughed. "I hope not it's a little early. I think it looks like an alien or something."

"Hey my baby is perfect don't talk them like that. It's okay, I love you mommy's just being moody." She smiled as he talked to her belly.

"Um we need to talk." He frowned at her. "Um about my family." She watched him for a minute.

"Look I'm okay with it but Álvarez can not come see our kid okay. Clay, hell none of the guys would like it." She stared at Juice for a minute.

"How? Why didn't you say anything?" She pushed his shoulder. "I've been worried sick over this you ass."

"Do you seriously think I wouldn't look in to your background? Babe I thought you were smarter than that. I'm cool with it but why are you trying to tell me now? Who knows?" He was rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb.

"Opie knows and he's going to tell the club." Juice nodded and kissed her hands.

"It'll be okay I'll talk to them explain what happened. Babe you're going to be okay I swear." She sighed at him.

"I love you."

"Love you too. You taking care of Meth?" She rolled her eyes at the man in front of her.

"Do you seriously think I wouldn't take care of my dog?" She asked him just a little pissed.

"You're dog? I don't think so, babe." He was glaring at her.

"Oh yeah if we ever break up I'm taking him with me." She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing at his face.

She laughed at him, "I'm not taking Meth. He takes up too much space on the bed."

~SOA~

Visiting him at six months pregnant meant that Gemma wanted to ride with her. Lyla, one of the guys or the prospect was with her at all times. Same went for Tara. Gemma had let her drive; the guys would usually take the keys from her or already be in the car.

She sighed as she parked the car, "You didn't have to come with me I'm a big girl. I'm tired of you all acting like I'm going to brake."

"Honey I know for a fact you don't brake easily. I'm here to see Clay." Gemma got out of the car.

"See Clay my ass." She left her purse in the car and carried the envelope of new pictures she had for him.

Gemma walked beside her holding on to her arm, "Actually I want to be the second person you tell whether it's a boy or girl."

Selena laughed, "Of course. I knew you had reasons. Hey Officer Manning." The guard smiled at her.

"Leave your keys in the box. The officer at the gate will look through the envelope. Ms. Fox." She smiled and nodded.

"Here you go." She waited patiently for the guard to look through them. The guard handed them back with a smile and stepped aside for her to go through.

As she walked into the room she noticed Juice was already at the table. He was staring at his hands. She sat the envelope on the table and watched as his head rose. He grinned at her and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"Hey baby." She leaned across the table and kissed his lips. "Who came with you this time?"

"Gemma rode with me. She wants to know what we're having." She opened the envelope pulling out black and white pictures. She handed them to Juice who was grinning. She watched as he looked through them.

"So what are we having? A little Selena or a lil Juice?" He was looking her like a child waiting to open a present.

"It's a boy." She smiled at him as he picked up the pictures and stared at them for a few minutes.

He stood up, "IT'S A BOY." The guards gave him a warning and he sat back down. "A boy? Wow. Have you thought about names?"

"Actually I wanted to talk to you about that. How would you feel if we named him Juan Carlos Ortiz Jr.?"


	10. Stealing Cinderella

_Selena_

She woke up smiling listening to her son crying in the next room. Juan Carlos Ortiz Junior was 8 months old and looked just like his father who happened to be coming home today. "I'm coming baby boy."

Her son was lying in the crib on his back. "Shh mama's right here. Yeah." She picked up her son and carried him to the kitchen where Meth was scratching at the door. She sat JC in his high chair then placed a few cheerios on the tray for him to eat. She then let Meth in and gave him his food.

The house phone rang. "Hello." She watched JC as the person on the phone started talking to her.

"Hey you ready for your man to come home?" It was Gemma and it sounded like the woman was smiling. Selena also heard Thomas in the background.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I? It means I don't have to take JC to the prison any more. What about you mama bear?" She gave JC a few more cheerios and smiled when Meth went to lie under the high chair.

"You know I am. Do you want me to stop by and pick you up?" She looked at the clock before answering.

"No Chibs is stopping by with Phil before they go get the boys. Phil's taking me to the clubhouse and then heading to Stockton." She heard a knock on the door. "That would be them. I'll see you later."

Meth went to the front door barking. "Get da mutt." She laughed most of the guys from the club didn't get along with Meth.

"Meth come here." Meth trotted back into the kitchen wagging his tail. She let him out the back door before picking JC up and walking into the living.

"Dere's my godson." Chibs started grinning at the baby before taking him. "Go get dressed. Ah'll watch him."

She shook her head. "Why don't you change and dress him godda?" He made a face at her but went to the boy's room.

She smiled. "Phil will get JC's bag ready please?" The big man nodded at her. She went to go change.

She was wearing light blue jeans, a red lacey undershirt with a black plaid shirt over the top and Tims. She pulled her long black hair up into a high pony-tail; she did natural make-up. Juice always said he like her better without it.

She smiled thinking about him and checking herself out in the mirror. She still had a few extra lbs from being pregnant but she thought it made her look voluptuous. She heard "Oh shit that's nasty what have ya been eating kid?"

She laughed and went to watch as the men gaged.

~SOA~

She didn't stand near Tara. They were not friends nor would they ever be. While the guys had been away they had had a falling out. Gemma said it was from stress but Selena said it was from Tara being an uppity bitch with no personality. Lyla had JC in her arms dancing around with him.

She heard the roar of the bikes before she saw them. She smiled as they pulled in and park. She walked toward Juice who was grinning from ear to ear. "Baby." Was all he said before attacking her mouth.

They pulled away gasping for air. "Missed you too." He smiled at her as wrapped his arm around her waist and walking to meeting Lyla.

Lyla handed JC to Juice. "Hey little man, you been good for your ma? Of course not." The baby cooed and giggled. "What?" He had noticed her staring at them.

"Nothing. Just, he looks so much like you, Papi." He smirked at her before stepping close and kissing her.

"Of course he does and when we have a little girl she'll look just like you." She felt butterflies in her stomach at those words accompanied by the way he was looking at her.

"We've got to meet. You going to be at home?" She took JC from him who was still cooing and slobbering on himself.

"No I'm covering the office for a while so ya'll can handle your business." She ran her hand through his hair. "Keep that for a while. I like it." She kissed his lips and headed to the office. She felt him smack her ass and shook her head.

~SOA~

JC got fussy so she decided to go home. She was sitting on the bed watching JC sleep when she heard the front door open usually it was Opie or Chibs. She smiled as Juice walked in instead. "I can't wait to get use to that."

"I'm going to put him to bed then me and you are going to have some fun." She nodded at him. She noticed that he was always gentle with JC and never got frustrated when the baby had started crying during their visits.

He walked back into the room pulling off his cut and placing it on the end of the bed. He pulled her so that she sat on the edge of the bed. "I've really missed you Selena." He placed his hand on her cheek and she leaned into it closing her eyes.

"I haven't been with anyone since you left." He kissed her lips sucking on the bottom one before pushing her back into the bed.

She lay on his chest looking at his face as he traced patterns in her back. He looked at her. "I think we should get married."

She scrunched her face. "Today? I don't think so. Today is Opie and Lyla's day. I'm not saying no. I would love to marry you Juan Carlos."

"Good cause I was thinking we could get married in a catholic church with all that shit that goes with it." She smiled at him in disbelief.

"You know if you want to do that you have to ask my father for permission." She laughed at the look on his face.

"Holy shit. I'm a dead man but I'll ask him anyway. You better start planning baby." He got up pulling her with him to go shower and get ready for Opie's wedding.

"Hey don't I get a ring?" He just smirked at her before kissing her under the spray from the shower head.

~SOA~

Opie was the first person she saw. "You look like sin, Selena. Where's JC?" She smiled at the compliment.

She wore a tight purple bandage dress with purple six inch pumps and her hair was curled and pined. Her make-up was simple: nude lips, baby doll pink cheeks and deep purple eye-shadow. "Thanks. He's with Anita."

"You still fighting with Tara?" He glanced around. "Oh yeah your father is going to be here."

"If I was, you would know. I know he's here. He wants to see JC but we'll see. Good luck." Selena kissed the edge of Opie's mouth before heading to her seat. Her chair was on Lyla's side while Juice's was on Opie's side.

During the ceremony she had teared up and Juice winking at her when he saw her looking at him only made her cry a little more. She did laugh at the line Jax made Opie say and then the chorus from the others. Afterwards Gemma handed her a tissue.

"Oh thanks it's just been a very emotional day." She smiled at the woman who smiled and patted her on the back before moving away. She walked up to Juice.

"Come let's dance before I have to leave." He wiped away her tears and pulled her out on to the dance floor. He pulled her close as a slow song played. "I um talked to your father before the ceremony started. He agreed to us getting married even suggested we use his church."

She kissed him. "My brave man. I'm proud that you had the courage to ask him that. I'll tell Gemma when I get a ring and then we'll start planning."

Happy tapped on Juice's shoulder. "Sorry. Let's go Juice." She nodded pulled him close and kissed him before letting go.

"Hey we'll be okay. Don't dance with none of these jackasses okay?" She laughed as he walked away. She went and sat at a table watching as people started to trickle away she saw her father talking with Clay and then her stepmother walking up to them.

She was staring into space when she felt a hand touch her. "Dance with me?" She smiled at Chucky.

"I accept that." She copied the word he always said. She allowed him to lead her out on the floor. He was telling her stories and she was laughing.

"Excuse me. My I cut in?" Tig Trager stood there grinning at her. "I don't bite unless you're into that kind of thing." She nodded at Chucky.

Chucky let her go and Tig took his place. "You wanna move your hand up?" She glared at the curly hair, blue eyed man.

"Nah I like where it is. Are you having fun?" She rolled her eyes at him but smiled. "Juice said you had a hard time right after the baby was born. Everything ok?"

She smiled at his concern. "Yeah just family drama you know how that goes." He nodded. "And yes I'm having fun."

"You waiting for Juice to take you home?" She shook her head no. "I'll take you. Come on. It's getting late."

_Juice_

He walked into the quit house he noticed Meth was on the couch. He rubbed the dog's head as he past to the kitchen. He noticed she hadn't changed anything while he was gone. Well except for JC's bedroom but she had discussed that with him. Sometimes he didn't like that she was afraid to ask questions but it was also a blessing.

He kicked off his boots at the door way to the living room. He made his way down the hall to their bedroom; he loved that word theirs and soon everything would be theirs. Before he could open the door to the bedroom he heard a coo from JC's room.

He padded in. JC did look so much like him that it wasn't ever any doubt about it. The baby was slobbering and chewing on his foot. "What would your ma say about you doing that?"

His son just smiled and cooed at him some more. "Tell you what you're cuter than Thomas and Abel combined. Also you're going to be smarter thanks to me and stronger thanks to your ma. Don't even get me started on what you're godda's going to teach you."

He leaned on the crib looking at his son. "I'm going teach you how to speak Yiddish, your ma'll teach you Spanish. I'm sure she's already started. Chibs'll teach whatever language he speaks. I'll teach everything you need to know about computers and motorcycles while your ma and godda'll teach you how to fight. Little man you are going to be able to do whatever you want in life even if you want to do what I do. Although I don't think your ma'll like that. Night baby boy."

He turned around and jumped. "Shit how long have you been there?" She walked to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Long enough. To know I really love you and I can't wait to have a little girl for you to spoil." She smiled up at him.

"Don't you think we should get married first and then we'll have another one, promise." He led her out of JC's room and into their room.

**[A/N: I need your opinion. Should I end it here or continue it till the end of season five? This means tearing apart their relationship and trying to fix it. This also means losing Opie and Chibs (as family). So let me know please. Oh yeah I plan for them to have more than just two kids.] **


	11. When did you know it was the end?

_Selena_

She stood in the bathroom in nothing but a bra and thong with clippers in her hand. Juice sat on the closed lid of the toilet seat in his boots and jeans. "I like your hair. Why do I have to do this?"

He reached for the clippers. "If you won't I will." She snatched them back. "Baby I know. I promise when we get married I'll let it grow out for the pictures."

She mumbled. "You better." She turned them on and started shaving the left side of his head. She felt him nip at her skin. "If you want this straight you won't do that."

He laughed at her. She was about to start on the other side when they heard. "Oy Juicy, where you at?"

"Sometimes I swear we have two kids." She whispered to him as she shaved a strip above his ear. Juice laughed again.

"Yeah well you picked him to be JC's godfather. In here." Juice placed his hands on her hips and moved her so he could see the door. "What's up?"

Chibs lit a cigarette before saying anything. "Where's baby Juice?" She didn't see him as she tilted Juice's head to the side making sure she didn't miss anything or nicked him.

"Asleep. Hey eyes to yourself. What are you doing here?" Juice asked as she bent his head down so she could cut the back in the arrow.

"Clubhouse." Juice sighed. Selena used a make-up brush to brush the little hairs off his face, ears and neck.

"You going to TM?" Juice asked her as he stood up brushing his chest off. She yawned and walked past Chibs, stopping to kiss his cheek.

"Yeah. I'm going to get dressed now. I'm taking JC in with me." She walked into their bedroom.

"When you two going to make it official?" She heard Chibs ask Juice. She heard the the breath he blew out before answering.

"When I get her a ring and ask her properly." She heard their footsteps head down the hall and out the door. She pulled on jeans, a plain white tee shirt and her boots.

~SOA~

She was filling out paper work when Gemma and Unser walked. "Selena will you give us a minute?" She stood, picked up JC's carrier and headed to the picnic tables. She was feeding from the bottle when all the guys came out of the clubhouse.

"Shit starts blowing up as soon as they get home. JC if you ever cause me as much worry as your daddy I kill you." He son just gurgled at her.

She watched as the man mounted the bikes but then there were sirens blaring. JC started crying and Selena took him out bouncing him. She watched as Roosevelt got out of his car. The man smiled at her and walked over to Clay.

"Shh baby. It's okay." She glared at the police officer that was watching her. She had had a few run ins with Eli Roosevelt. It's one of the reasons her and Tara had got in to it. Roosevelt walked toward her heading for the clubhouse.

"You look good Miss Fox and your son's cold is gone." He smiled at her as he walked past. Maybe he thought she hadn't told Juice about being harassed by the local law enforcement wrong.

Juice patted her arms and kissed JC's head before following them into the clubhouse. She had got JC to sleep when she heard crashing and glass breaking coming from the clubhouse. She walked in cover JC's head and gasped at the sight in front of her. Roosevelt was swinging an ax and the horror on the men's face was speaking more word then anything.

She walked out and headed for the office. Gemma met her halfway there. "what's going on?" Gemma was looking behind her.

"Roosevelt's destroying the clubhouse." She watched as the frown lines on Gemma's face became deeper.

"Shit. Come on. We'll see how this ends." She followed Gemma to the clubhouse only for Roosevelt to come out with a smile on his face.

~SOA~

They stood in the ruins of the clubhouse. Juice had JC in his arms and a lost look on his face. Selena kissed his head and whispered "I know Baby."

Selena was rubbing Juice's back and Clay talked about a clean-up crew. Tara's voice rose over the din over people moving things.

"I have so good news." Her voice sounded unsure as everyone turned to look at her. Tara raised her hand in the air to show a ring. "We're engaged."

People were in shock so it took a few seconds for people to get excited. Juice gave her a look and shrugged. She smiled and kissed his lips before taking JC so he could drink. "If you get too drunk to drive I'm not staying here."

He gulped a mouthful of beer. "No but you will give me a ride right?" He pulled them into his side.

"Um no. You get handsy when you're drunk." She laughed at his frown.

~SOA~

She was lying in the bed with JC on her chest asleep. She smiled as Meth jumped on the bed and lay beside them. "Uhnuhuh mutt get off the bed go lay on the couch." The dog jumped off the bed. "You taught him some bad habits."

She glared at him. "Someone had to keep me warm or would you prefer Kozik be my bed warmer while you're in prison from now on?"

"Oh hell naw. Fine Meth can lay in the bed but only when I'm not here." He rubbed JC's back.

"Fine and if I ever go to prision you can get a cat." He laughed at her cause he knew she was a jealous woman and if any girl came on to him while she was there would be a fight.

"Naw I'm good. Hey I'm still looking for a ring. You got anything in mind?" He was looking at her and she could see the love in his eyes.

"No whatever you pick out should be just fine." JC started moving around and Juice picked him up.

"Are you sure? Cause money's no object." Right then it hit her just how much he loved her and how much she loved him. Juice wasn't the kind to settle down and neither was she.

"Yeah." She kissed him. "Pick me something out that suits you. Whatever you pick Juan Carlos I will love. But if you still want help ask Gemma."

He nodded and looked at the clock. "I got to go I'll call you later." He laid JC on the bed before kissing her deeply. He hand groped her breast causing her to moan. "Bye babe."

"Asshole if you don't come home tonight I'm helping myself." He groaned as he put his cut on and then his jacket.

"Selena don't tease me." He was whining but it was still sexy. He kissed JC on the head and then her again. "I'll be home if I can. Love you JC. Love you Selena."

She smiled her biggest smile. "I love you Juan Carlos. Come home period whether early or late just be here."

~SOA~

"Hello." Chibs never called so she was a little worried as she picked up her cell phone. She stuffed some laundry into the washing machine.

"Darling Juicy got picked up." She dropped the basket and ran to get her shoes on. She had the right on before she asked.

"What for?" She pulled on the left and was heading to JC's room as Chibs answered her question.

"I assume for parole violation they found weed in his pocket. What are you doing?" She was put a clean oneise on JC.

"Going to the fucking police station. I'm not Tara I'm not going to sit and wonder what's happening." She picked up JC and put him in the carrier.

"Don't take the boy drop him off with Anita. Take a breath." Chibs was just trying to hang but she hung up on him anyway. She did do as he suggested through and dropped JC off at Anita's.

She stomped into the police station ready to fight whoever but she was met by a depressed looking Juice. He was looking down at the ground. "Juice?"

He looked up at her and smiled. She threw his arms around him. "I'm okay they just wanted talk. Look no bruises nothing." She didn't let go to look at him. "Where's JC?"

She kissed his neck. "With Anita." He picked her up so that her feet weren't touching the floor, hugging her.

"Come on you can take me to get my bike." She nodded as he sat her down and they walked out to her car. She stopped from unlocking in the car.

"Is there something you're not telling me Juice? Because I love no matter what and whatever happened or was said stays between us." She played with her keys but keep her eyes on him.

He shook his head and didn't look at her. "It doesn't matter it can't hurt us. Let's go." She felt a little hurt that he was pulling away now after everything and she couldn't help but think she had done something wrong.

**[A/N: Trying to push the story forward but still give enough information and keep a steady pace. Sorry if this is filler. I'm trying to stick as close to the show as possible but also add things in for the story.]**


	12. Lines are starting to blur

_Selena_

She was dressing JC for daycare when Juice walked in. "Can we talk?" He asked her and the tone of his voice said it wasn't going to be pleasant.

"Depends is it going to cause a fight? Because I don't want to fight with you before you leave." She was snapping JC's onesie as she talked to him. She placed him back in his crib before walking out of the room with Juice following.

"I don't know. You said that you would be here no matter what right?" She nodded and waited for him to continue. He sighed and sat on their bed. "Um you know Roosevelt had me brought in for a parole violation? He has information on me and he's using it."

She frowned. "What kind of information? You can tell me. I love you Juan Carlos." She stood in front of him and picked up his hands. "Tell me."

He kissed her hands and looked up into her eyes. "You promise right? What I tell you won't leave this room? It could get me killed, Selena."

She nodded. "Yes I swear on our son's life." She frowned at him and searched his eyes. In his eyes she saw fear and guilt; her heart ached for him.

"Okay; fuck, I don't know how to say this. Shit, Selena I'm scared. I don't want to lose you or JC." Her started racing it must be bad. "I'll just say it." He hesitated and ran a hand over his mohawk and took a deep breath. "My father was black."

She felt the bottom drop and thought about the rules she had grown up around and wondered if they were the same. Her father was racist and had tried to teach his kids the same thing.

All these thoughts were running through her head but in the end she only saw the man she loved in front of her. "I still love you and I would never leave you but what about the club?" She touched his face and stared into his eyes.

She felt the stubble on his cheeks under her hands; she took in the scent of him which was grease, smoke, and soap; it calmed her.

"What did you just say?" He was staring at her in disbelief. The look in his eyes changed from scared to hopeful and she saw love there. "Say it again." He stood up so that he was looking down at her now. Her hands had fallen to his chest and the cut; she tugged on it and smiled up into his brown eyes.

"I still love you, Juice. I'm not my father. You're the father of my baby and my fiancé, I love you." She barely got to finish before he was pushing her onto the bed. His soft lips on hers and his hand making sure her head didn't hit the bed.

"I love you. I can't tell them Selena. They're my family just like you and JC; I can't lose that." She nodded as his hand touched the bare skin of her back. She knew as his hand ran over her skin that this conversation was over for now.

~SOA~

She was at TM doing paperwork and trying to forget what Juice had said this morning because every time she thought about it words her father used to say kept coming back to her. Eventually she got tired of it and took a walk behind the garage. She lit a cigarette and leaned against the cool brick wall.

"I thought you quit." She opened her eyes to see Opie standing in front of her with pity in his eyes. "He'll be okay." She loved Opie like a brother he had been there for her while Juice had been in prison and he had let her live with him right after Juan Carlos Jr. was born.

She gave him a weak smile before asking. "Why'd you come back here? It's not like you to be hiding out."

He leaned beside her on the wall taking the cigarette from her. "No but I remember when Tara and Gemma use to fuss over you this is where you came. I also remember this is where you went into labor because you are so stubborn." He chuckled at her.

"Yeah Gemma and Tara were so overbearing because I was further along than Tara and I had Braxton hicks that one time. Not to mention I didn't have proper care for almost four months." She kicked a rock.

"Not to mention you would disappear for hours on end." Opie smirked at her knowing she'd roll her eyes and glare at him.

"I was with you or Chibs; it wasn't like I was off by myself." Opie laughed which was a rare thing these days. "I wasn't raised by women and I feel more comfortable with men." She didn't enjoy girl time most days and Opie would watch sports with her and Chibs would watch scary movies with her.

"Can I see it?" Opie asked. She blinked at him before remembering that morning before Juice left. "I know he gave it to you cause, he asked me about them. Now let me see."

"Of course you helped him pick it out." She mumbled to herself as she pulled the necklace out of her shirt. On the chain was a ring of black gold with a topaz stone and a crow on either side. He had given it to her this morning before he left the house only saying 'To make it official.'

She pulled the necklace off and put the ring on her finger and showed Opie who smiled into her eyes. "Finally got a crow on you."

She laughed at the bear of a man and hugged him before they walked out from behind the building to go back to work.

~SOA~

She was leaving to go pick JC up from daycare and passed Gemma coming into the office. "Where you going?" Gemma asked which for some reason was grating on Selena's nerves.

Selena pushed her hair back from her forehead with her left hand. "I'm picking JC up from daycare then going home." Gemma walked toward her and grabbed her hand.

"What's this and when did it happen?" Gemma was looking down at her hand. "I thought you weren't going to get married. Hell I remember asking you and you ran." Selena wanted to jerk her hand back. She didn't know why Gemma was suddenly an enemy other than Selena felt she had to protect what was hers.

"Juice asked me to marry him and I said yes. I only got the ring this morning but he asked me after he got out of prison. Gemma I was waiting till he got back to tell people." She felt like she had to defend herself.

Gemma smiled and hugged her. "I'm so happy for you. Have you started planning? I could help you. I know a florist and the perfect place." She laughed and smiled at the older woman.

"No we haven't decided on anything other than we're getting married and we want it to be very Catholic." She watched as Gemma frowned at her.

"Do you honestly think they would allow us in a church?" Gemma placed her hands on her hips like she was readying herself for a fight.

"My father church allows bikers so don't worry I'll get my stepmother to plan it." She didn't like the fact that Gemma was going to try and control her wedding. "Now if you'll excuse me I have to go get my son." She turned away from Gemma pissed.

~SOA~

Over the years Selena had kept secrets from little white lies to life destroying things so the fact that Juice was half black was nothing but her father was in her head constantly. She looked down at her son and realized that if her father ever found out he would disowned his grandson; she refused to put her son through that especially since they would have to see him for the rest of their lives.

She brushed his hair down with her hair. She loved how much her son looked like his father who hadn't been home in days. She wasn't too worried he called every few hours although the last time he called he sound scared. She watched as JC pulled on his socks and just smiled; Juice didn't like socks too much either.

She started to pick up the nursery when there was knock on the door. She sat the basket she had in her hands down and went to open the door. She opened the door to see Juice leaning on Chibs. She stepped back as the men made their way to the couch. "What happened?" Her voice sounded weak to her.

"Traitor tried to kill Juicy." Her heart started beating faster in her chest as she went to sit beside Juice on the couch.

"Who was it?" She said harshly as her mind was trying to piece things together from Juice's calls to Chibs' words. She touched his face; he was cool and clammy. "Are you okay?" Her tone was softened.

Juice smiled at her. "Yeah he shot me in the leg, didn't hit anything important. Tara stitched me up and gave me some antibiotics and painkillers so I'm good, baby." She shook her head at the man in front of her. She wasn't going to get a straight answer any time soon.

"Remind me to thank the doc." She looked at Chibs and said in a voice she would later call her mom voice but right now it was a no nonsense tone. "What happened and don't lie to me or fucking sugar coat it."

Chibs and Juice looked at her like she had grown a second head. She sighed and waited for one of them to talk and she was getting impatient.

"Alright fine. You want the truth; I'll give you the truth. Someone stole a brick of cocaine from a shipment. Juice went to take a piss and saw Miles with the brick and tried to stop him. Miles shot him in the leg they fought and Juice shot Miles in the head. No lie and I didn't fucking sugarcoat it, love." She heard Chibs but she couldn't believe it.

She had let Miles take care of JC while she went to go visit Juice in prison. She had liked Miles but finally the pieces fit. Juice and the phone calls, _shit. _

"Shit. Oh baby. Let's get you into bed." She stood up and Chibs followed her lead. They helped Juice get back to the room and into bed. Selena took off his boots, Chibs stood in the doorway watching. She unzipped his jacket, pulled it off with his cut laying them over the back of a chair before she checked his pockets. She blew out a breath as she looked down at the sleeping man. She kissed him and turned to leave the room only to find Chibs watching her with a smile on his face.

"What?" She walked past him pushing a piece of hair behind her ear feeling self-conscious. She went to check on JC and finish picking up.

"Nothing just I'm glad he has you. I'm glad you and him are going to get married. You're like my daughter and I love you. Take care of him Selena." Chibs kissed her forehead before going over to the crib to kiss JC and then he left.


	13. Trust and Believe

_Selena_

She sat on the edge of the bed not wanting to be in this room with him; in her head she was arguing with herself. She didn't know how she felt. When she was sixteen she said she would never date an outlaw and here she sat engaged to one; there was also a baby involved.

'You can't leave the life, the life leaves you'. Her father's words echoed in her head. He was right; she had left but had been pulled back in by a brown eyed boy with a Mohawk. She winced and stood up, walking out of their room, where Juice laid. She was pacing in the living room, mumbling to herself, trying to fight the urge to leave and just walk away from all of this. She flopped down on the couch, throwing one arm over her face and fighting the urge to cry.

She didn't hear a door open or Juice talking to their son. She didn't hear him come into the living room until JC started giggling. She uncovered her eyes to see her boys smiling at each other and giggling. She stood up and went to them. "How are you feeling this morning?"

He kissed her. "Hmmhmm good. You?" His tone was a little concerned. He was looking into her eyes and she knew she couldn't leave - not because it would break him, but because it would break her to leave and never come back.

"Yeah I've just been up and down a lot lately. I don't know what's wrong with me honestly." She forced happiness into her tone even though she knew Juice could tell she was faking it.

The look he gave her was the one he gave JC when he was acting up. "What are you planning on doing today?" He asked her. There was tension in the air but neither of them was going to talk about it.

He sat JC in his highchair and went to the cabinet pulling out Cheerios and placing them on the tray. He wasn't looking at her as he moved around the kitchen. She watched him as he started making breakfast.

He looked at her and raised an eyebrow waiting for her to answer him. "I don't have to work so it's just me and Jacey hanging out, think I might go shopping." Juice nodded at her.

He flipped the eggs over. "Do you need some money?" He asked. They both smiled when JC cooed and picked up a Cheerio.

She shook her head. "Okay maybe just a little. I need to get some diapers. Do you need anything?" Juice handed her a plate with a fried egg and a couple of pieces of bacon.

"Nah." The conversation dropped. It was the first morning that they hadn't woken up together in bed when he was home. He was stiff and she was depressed. There were unsaid things on both ends both felt betrayed and angry. He stood up placed his plate in the sink, kissed JC on the head and walked out the door.

She sighed as she watched her son cram Cheerios in his mouth with wet fingers. She didn't know how much longer she could do this. She didn't know if she could handle another child if their father wasn't here.

~SOA~

She got a call from Gemma saying her father had been shot and was being at the clubhouse. Figures she'd get that call as she stood at the checkout of the CVS. She made her purchase and headed to the clubhouse.

When she got to the clubhouse the guys were standing around the bar. Bobby nodded at her while Clay spoke. "Tara's patching your father up; he should be fine."

She nodded and walked into the chapel with JC on her hip. Her father saw her and spoke. "Hi baby Luna. Little man." Marcus gave her a weak smile.

"How you feeling papi?" She watched as Chibs lit up a joint and handed it to her father. Chibs gave her a slight smile.

"I'm okay the doc is pretty good." Selena smiled at her father. Tara was cleaning and looking at the wound.

"Yeah she is. She patched Juice up the other day and it's healing nicely. She's good with her hands, papi." Marcus nodded at her. Tara had looked up when Selena had praised her with a smile.

She heard Juice's voice out in the bar and tensed. "I'm gonna let Tara take care of you. Jacey needs to be fed."

Marcus frowned at her. "You're going to confuse the boy switching names like that. I like Jacey better than JC though."

She shook her head and walked out of the room avoiding Juice. She made her way to Juice's dorm room.

~SOA~

The scariest phone call she ever got was Chibs calling asking if she had seen him. She hadn't and he hadn't called. She started pacing the floor and calling his cell but she only got his voicemail. She was getting worried. She knew he wasn't stable right not with the guilt from killing Miles, Roosevelt blackmailing him and her not showing him how much she cared.

She had called him for the hundredth time and got the same thing, no answer she threw her phone in frustration. She started crying and throwing shit. She knew it was hormones and she was losing her mind with worry she knew how it felt to kill someone and regret it. She wanted to take his pain but she knew this was something he had to work out by himself.

She sank to her knees and curled on the floor in a fetal position, praying for Juice to be okay. She needed him like she needed air right now and not knowing what was going on with him was killing her. She heard JC stir and crawled to the wall to help her get off the floor. She placed a hand on her stomach and walked down the hall to JC's room.

~SOA~

She was walking to the kitchen to get a bottle of water when she heard something at the door. She reached into the cookie jar on the counter grabbing a gun Juice had put there 'Just in case.' She checked it before she headed to the door.

She looked through the peep hole and didn't see anything. She turned the deadbolt on the door and the lock on the knob to open the door. She heard a sniffle as the door opened. Someone was on her porch in a black hoodie crying. She flipped the outside light on and the person turned around. Juice.

She put the gun on the side table by the door. She didn't close the door as she went out; she wanted to yell at him for not calling, staying out late, and for being drunk but the look in his eyes stopped it all. She sat down beside him, not touching him, not talking, just waiting for him to speak, to tell her what was going on.

He sat down the bottle and pushed his hood back; she gasped as she saw his neck. It was raw covered with dried blood and bruises He looked away from her. Tears ran down her cheeks as she reached out to touch him, thinking he was a ghost. "I'm sorry." His voice was torn and raw.

He turned to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, his head in her lap. "I'm sorry." She was in denial. He wouldn't, didn't, no, not her Juice. "I thought it would be easier for me, for you. It was a mistake. I swear." She felt her lip quivered and her hand was shaking as she petted him, trying to calm him down.

Once he stopped sobbing she was able to find her voice and speak. "Come lets go inside." He nodded into her stomach. He stood on his own and walked inside. She picked up the bottle of Jack Daniels and followed him in. She locked the door and placed the gun back in its hiding place. She threw the bottle of JD in the trash can and went to go find her man.

She walked through their room to the bathroom where she found him sitting in just his jeans with the shower running. She sat in front of him placing her hands on either side of his face. "Talk to me. Tell me how I can help you, please."

He pulled her into his lap. "I need this. I need you. Please don't leave… please." He sounded like a scared little boy as he spoke into her neck. She held him and nodded.

"I'll never leave you ever. Trust and believe that." She kissed his neck softly. She didn't know how long she sat in his lap, just holding onto him, breathing him in knowing he might not have been here, that some god or person stepped in and brought him back to her. She thanked God to be able to touch his warm body and feel his chest rise and fall. She would never take it for granted.


	14. Kiss

Set during **Kiss 4x09**

_Juice_

He stood with Chibs in the garage waiting for Jax. He could feel his phone vibrate in his pocket but knew better than to answer it. He didn't need this now, a couple of days ago yeah he needed someone to talk to him but not now. Now he had Selena who was always calling and checking on him, asking about his day, and telling him she loved him.

Before he had left this morning she had made him promise to come home tonight. He did and he loved watching the smile that appeared across her face. Yeah, he loved and he needed her more than he needed anyone or anything.

He watched as Jax walked over to them smoking a cigarette. "What's going on?" Jax asked Chibs and Juice wanted to answer 'Nothing', but he let Chibs answer slightly ashamed of his behavior.

"Gonna need your advice brother." Chibs pulled off his sunglasses and stuck them in his cut while looking at Jax. Juice's head was hung low starting to feel guilty when Chibs reached out to move his cut so that he could show Jax the bruises on his neck.

Juice looked away not wanting to see the reaction on his brother's face. "What about?" Jax asked. "I thought you caught it on security chains at Oswalt's." Jax started to look between him and Chibs, slowly piecing things together, "Awe shit, Juice."

Juice looked away from his brothers, knowing what they were thinking and wishing they weren't. "I don't know what happened, man." He felt his eyes get teary. "I guess doing the time, the Russians, and Miles…"

He didn't add Selena; no they weren't as close as they use to be and they had had problems but he loved her and thought that she and his son were his reason to live. He was now thankful for the branch snapping even if it meant hearing her worry or seeing her frown when he got quiet.

Juice heard Chibs say, "I'm not sure how we should handle this" and he thought to himself: 'you don't. I'll handle it with my fiancé.'

"It was a mistake. I know that. I have a lot to live for, Jax: Selena and Jace. Selena.." He gulped. "She knows about this." He watched his brother's faces waiting for a reaction.

"Give us a minute." Jax said. He gave a slight nod before he walked away. He leaned up against a car and pulled out his phone, remembering Selena's missed call.

_Selena_

"So do you know what your son did this morning?" She asked as soon as she picked up the phone knowing that it was Juice. She heard him give a slight chuckle. She walked from the kitchen to the living room where Meth laid on the couch. She flopped down beside the pitbull. She made sure the baby monitor was on so she could hear Jace if he woke up.

She grinned to herself as Juice said."No what did _our _son do this morning?" She could hear the smile in his voice but she also knew he had talked to Jax and Chibs that morning.

"I put him on a blanket on the floor in the living, went to go start some laundry and when I came back he was standing up on the coffee table." She smiled. "I've got pictures. I'm going to send them to you."

"Good, I can't wait to see them. Make sure he knows I'm proud of him." This time she heard the depressed tone in his voice. She missed her confident man.

"I'm sure he knows, just like we're proud of you." She tugged on a loose string on his t-shirt that she was wearing. "So how is everything going?" She asked. She wished she could help him more.

He sighed into the phone before answering her. "Okay I guess. I think they're talking about whether or not to vote me out." She heard the sadness clearly in his voice now.

She hurt for him. The MC was his family, had been for years."They love you Juice, they're not going to do that." She whispered into the phone as she sat back on the couch putting her feet up on the coffee table.

"Yeah I don't know Selena. I mean Sons don't try to off themselves and then this other shit that's going on." She felt her stomach clench listening to him talk and the tone of his voice.

She placed a hand over her belly. "If they do, Juice, it's me, you and Jace, always. I'm here no matter what happens. I love you." She mentally added, 'plus baby number two.'

"Love you too, Selena." She heard him sigh into the phone. "I gotta go. Talk to you later, Mami. Hey, thanks for ….you know." She smiled as he hung up.

~SOA~

She pulled up to Teller-Morrow and witnessed Roosevelt talking to Juice. 'Fucking asshole.' She got out of the car slamming the door before opening the backdoor to get Jace out. She felt someone beside her.

"Good afternoon Ms. Fox", said Roosevelt as he nodded towards her and her son. She returned the greeting with a glare that whipped the smile off his face. "I gather that you've seen Juan Carlos' neck…"

"You son of a…" She took a quick look around before continuing. "You know this is all on you; he wouldn't have gone and did what he did if you hadn't marked him as the weakest link. If you don't back the hell off, Eli….if he ends up dead because of you…..you're going to end up too."

"Are you threatening me?" Roosevelt looked shocked and she knew why. He knew her background. MC father, former Marine, and she had killed a man.

"No. I'm promising. Look I know you're not the ringleader and I understand why you're doing this but you're supposed to protect people not get them killed." She was glaring daggers at the Sheriff.

"Look I didn't know they were going to do this to him, to me. I'm sorry. You have to understand I don't have a choice about this; Juice is a criminal.." Roosevelt was pleading with his eyes to forgive him.

She sighed, letting go of her anger. "I need you to do me a favor Eli." It was to calm her nerves. She was pregnant and didn't need the stress."If you are really sorry."

"Yeah of course. As long as it's legal that is." He was nodding at her and looking like he'd do anything to placate his guilt.

"When – When you do pick him up will you let me know? I don't want to worry and think he's um… you know. I won't tell anyone". She knew there were unshed tears in her eyes.

Roosevelt nodded at her. "Yeah, I can do that and again I'm sorry about this. I didn't know this was going to happen. I'll call you if we do pick him up but you have to promise not to say anything."

She nodded at him, "Thank you." She closed her eyes for just a second relaxing just slightly. She was always so tense now. She felt his hand squeeze her arm and she opened her eyes.

She watched him walk away and get in his car. She sighed and shook her head as she got the carrier out of the back seat. She walked in the office and started filling out the paperwork she was only there until Gemma got back.


	15. Call Of Duty

**Much Thanks to my Beta Raluca who helps to clean up the chaos. **

"You goin' to see Tara today?" He asked with his toothbrush in his mouth and foam dribbling down his chin. She laughed at the man who was childlike sometimes.

She was bathing Jace in the tub, "No, I'm not going to visit her. I'll go help out with Abel and Thomas." She picked up Jace and wrapped him in a soft towel and carried him out to their bed where she had placed more towels.

"Are you ever goin' to tell me what happened between you two?" He leaned on the door frame watching Selena rub lotion on Jace and making faces.

"No, its girl stuff and nothin' you have to worry about, Papi." That statement wasn't true because it was about the club, Tara and Piney. "It'll blow over; just Tara actin' high and mighty; you know I hate those kind of women."

He smirked at her and went back into the bathroom to rinse. After he walked into the bedroom and lay beside them on the bed. He was tickling Jace's stomach, and, smiling at his fiancé he said: "Okay fine don't tell me. So...when do you want to get married?"

She rolled her eyes at him as she put Jace's diaper on. "When you give me money to buy a dress and book the church and buy flowers and get a caterer and a cake. Have you even told the Sons we're getting married? You know, besides Opie and Gemma..."

"I'll tell them today if that's what you want. I'll get one of the prospects to bring you the cash and go shopping with you. You can make 'em try dresses on." Both of them started laughing.

"Can you imagine Ratboy in a dress?" Selena asked with a huge grin on her face. Juice started fake gaging and looked horrified.

"Ugh... that's nasty." He glanced at the clock. "I gotta go, see ya later, Baby. Bye, baby boy." Juice kissed her lips and Jace's forehead.

_Juice_

He arrived at the warehouse to see his brothers standing around, some smoking, other's talking and laughing. The place was just a little tense but he cleared his throat and waited for his brothers to look at him.

"What's up Juice?" Bobby asked with a concerned tone. Juice looked around at Happy, Chibs, Clay, Bobby, Tig and Kozik who were waiting for him to talk.

"Um I don't know how to say this but um... the day after we got out of Stockton," Juice licked his lips and swallowed. "I, um, asked Selena to marry me." Juice didn't have to wait much for the news to kick in; it was all a few seconds before the hollers, handshakes, and pats on the back started.

Tig hugged him first. "I hope you know what you're doing Juicy." He laughed at him and smiled, shaking his head as he moved away.

_Selena_

She was walking through the hospital with Jace on her hip because she needed to talk to Gemma when a woman bumped into her. "Oh I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Even as she said it her bag fell to the floor. She sighed as the contents of her purse spilled out on the floor, which included her prenatal vitamins, phone, a picture of her and Juice, her wallet and a manilla envelope with money in it.

"I'll get it, don't worry." The blond had knelt down to help her pick up the stuff; it was better for her because she couldn't actually do it herself with Jace on her hips and her balance being off.

"Thanks so much." Selena smiled at the woman who handed her back her purse but the woman didn't smile at her.

"I'm Wendy." The woman said it like Selena was supposed to know her but she couldn't place the name or face. "Jax's ex-wife and Abel's mother. You must be Juice's old lady."

"Oh, I see.. now I can put the name with the face." Selena wasn't happy to be standing in front of the woman who could have killed Abel. "Let me guess you're sober and want to see your son, right? Well he ain't your son, mothers don't put their kids in danger and you better not traumatize that sweet little boy. I know your type; you get sober and get your kid back but as soon as it gets hard you go right back to the drugs. Leave him alone don't jerk him and Jax around. Now if you'll excuse me I have another bitch I have to speak to."

She left _Wendy _standing there, gaping at her; women like that made Selena's skin boil and reminded her of her mother that she had seen only a few times. She didn't even make it all the way to Tara's room before she had to find a waiting area to sit.

She could feel the panic rising in her chest and pulled Jace toward her. Everything was so different this time around; with Jace she had been pissed off all the time but with this baby she was scared and worried. She was scared that she would become Gemma or Tara or even Wendy but never her mother - never.

That woman, her mother, claimed her father, Marcus, had raped her and he'd been convicted of it. After he got out he sued for custody of Selena. Selena remembered the first time she saw her father and knew it was him because they had the same skin tone and black hair. She was out on the porch; her mom was in the house with an 'Uncle'. He rode up in a black El Camino, having recognized the car because she had nothing better to do than read magazines left by dirty men with black stains on their hands.

He walked up the pathway in jeans and a plain black button up with his hair slicked back and his cowboy boots. He smiled at her and she just knew that was her Daddy; don't ask her why but she did. He knelt in front of her on the step saying: "Hi my name is Marcus. Selena, I'm your father."

She heard those words and threw herself into his arms, gripping his neck as tightly as she could. He stood and held her close to him as she whispered "I knew you'd come." She couldn't even hear the front door open and her mother start yelling at her father - all she knew was that she'd never be hit again for falling or dropping something.

Selena came back to the present feeling the panic subsided from her chest. No. She would never become her mother. Jace was cooing at her, "I think it's time we told Papi about your brother or sister don't you think so miho?" Jace just blew a bubble at her and she sighed.

~SOA~

She was in the kitchen cleaning up when she heard the door open and shut. "Juice is that you?" She called out as she dried her hands and then she walked into the hallway. Juice stood at the door, his face a picture of despair. "What happened?" She asked terrified, her thoughts lingering over recent events.

She stopped a few inches away from him. He rubbed his face before he answered, "Kozik's dead. He got blown up today." He moved toward her and put his hand on her face. "I was in the middle of a mine field and all I could think of was my son not knowing his father and I had to get the fuck out of there. I think I scared Jax and Chibs." She closed her eyes trying to push the panic away. "Then, when we got back to the clubhouse, I told Chibs that Roosevelt was using my black daddy against me to get information." He took a breath before continuing. "It was kind of nice to get off my chest."

She bit her lip and pulled away from him, "Um speaking of getting stuff off your chest." She walked away from him and stepped into the living room. She stopped in the middle of the room and turned to look at him. "I'vebeenwantingtotellyouforawh ilenowIdidn'tknowhowtosayitbutI'mpregnant."

He frowned and walked closer to her, "I didn't understand anything you just said. Relax and say it again, Selena."

She moved to stand in front of him with every ounce of courage she could muster; she picked up his hand and placed it on her stomach, "I'm pregnant."

His face went from 'the end of the world - sad' to 'this is the best day ever - happy', "I thought so, but I didn't want to say anything."

She slapped his arm. "You could have said _something._" He gave her a look, "Yeah okay you couldn't - but are you happy to have another baby?"

He wrapped his arms around her and smirked at her. "Of course I am and if anything could've made this fucked up day good, it would be the news of you having another child. I really needed this..and you.. to have something to make the hard days better. I love you Selena."

She kissed his lips, "I love you to Juan Carlos Senior."


	16. Brunt and Purged Away

It was about 1 in the morning; Jace was asleep while she and Juice laid on the couch in the living room. The TV was off. Selena laid with her head on his chest, her hand tracing shapes over his heart. Juice had entered the house a little after midnight and thrown his cut across the rocker closest to the door. Selena had noticed that as time passed and the lines in his forehead got deeper, the cut went from being carefully placed to being thrown haphazardly anywhere. The other day she had found it on the floor just outside the bathroom door. It saddened her to see but knew that the blame rested on Roosevelt and an unknown entity's head.

Selena had been in the kitchen fixing bottles for Jace when she heard the door open. She walked into the hallway to see Juice coming in. Juice gave her a half smile and moved to her until her could pull her to him, wrapping his arms around her. Selena pulled them to the couch; Juice flopped down on his back pulling her with him.

They laid there, Juice tracing her spine and her taking in his warmth and the smell of burnt wires and motor oil. No would ever understand her love of those scents when the smells had disappeared from the house when he was in prison she became moody and very bitchy.

"Hey," Juice's voice broke through her thoughts about his time in prison.

"Hmm?" She lifted her chin so that she could see his face.

"What did you look like in high school?" His face was open and curious but there was mischief in his eyes.

She laughed. "You don't even want to know." She sat up tucking one leg under her and throwing the other over Juice's body.

"Yes I do tell me." Juice was giving her the puppy dog eyes. Boy could he work it with those brown eyes of his.

"Ugh. Fine. I look like a Chula." Juice started laughing. She slapped his chest playfully. "See this is why I don't tell you things."

She tried to get away from the laughing man but he sat up trapping her legs against him. "No it's not that you looked like a Chula it's I don't believe it."

She frowned at her future husband, "Why don't you believe it?"

He smirked at her and said, "because you look and act like a white girl?"

Selena smacked his arm, "Hey, I'm a half white and that means your kid is 1/4th."

"How is that?" Juice asked rubbing her thigh. She knew where this was headed.

"You're black and Puerto Rican. I'm Mexican and white. So he's 1/4th white." She licked her lips when she noticed where Juice was staring.

"Oh yeah." His grin got bigger as he leaned toward her catching her lips. He pulled back looking into her eyes, "Will you dress like that for me?"

She hated when he used sex against her. "Mmmm if you move that hand just a little bit lower I might." His hand which had been massaging her breast moved away. "_Hey._"

Juice stood up smirking as always before scooping her up making her giggle as he carried her down the hall to their bedroom.

~SOA~

She was looking for a box of maternity clothes when her phone rang; the caller ID read Juice. "Hello?"

"Hey babe. I'm going to go the weed shop and just wanted to let you know so you don't freak out okay?" He didn't sound excited or like he wanted to but the only thing he sounded excited about anymore was his kids.

"Okay call me when you get done. I love you Juan Carlos be safe." She was concerned about him and just a little stressed about everything that was going on.

"Love you. Tell Jace I love him too." He hung up. She looked down at her hand where his ring sat and prayed that one day she would be his wife just not his baby mama or girlfriend.

She took a big breath and blew it out causing her cheeks to puff up. "Your father is gonna give me gray hairs before I'm 30." She found the box that held her clothes from when she was pregnant with Jace.

The box was full of things Gemma had brought her but she had refused to wear cause it was to girly. When she was pregnant with Jace she mostly wore t-shirts and jeans with the elastic in them. In the box there were sundresses and skirts; stuff she refused to wear.

She sighed as she pulled out a bright pink dress with the stretchy top and the skirt went all the way to the floor. She curled her lip at it before throwing it back in the box and then pushing the box to the back of the closet. She walked down the hall before a thought crossed her mind _Juice would love to see me in that._

~SOA~

She was starting to get worried it didn't usually take hours for Juice to finish his business at his store so she was starting to really panic when the sky turned dark and she still hadn't heard anything from Juice.

She pulled out her cellphone and called someone who might know what's going on. She tapped her fingers on the counter as she listened to the phone ring. Her patience was starting to wane.

"Sheriff Roosevelt?" The man sounded calm if not a little bored.

"Where is he?" She asked trying to hold back the emotions that were threatening to take her over. Being pregnant everything was heightened.

"Ms. Fox?" He questioned. "If you're asking about Juice then I don't know. I would have called you if I knew anything. But I might have an idea where your boyfriend is."

"Oh do you have an idea? Then how about you share it with me cause I'm pregnant and the stress isn't helping damn it." She said all this through clenched teeth.

This time when Roosevelt talk she heard concern in his voice, "Look the guy I was helping probably has Juice in custody to keep him from telling the others the plan. He should be safe. You need to come up with a way to explain why you don't know where he is. If you tell them the truth it could get him killed. I have to go. Oh, and congratulations on the baby and your engagement." The phone disconnected.

She felt like sobbing but held it together. She let Meth in and went to get Jace from his crib before climbing into her and Juice's bed.

~SOA~

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON AROUND HERE?" Chibs had just called her asking where Juice was and she had lied.

"I haven't seen him since yesterday morning. He's probably off riding. He got some news the other day." She said glad that she and Chibs wasn't face to face right now.

"What kinda news?" Chibs asked concern lacing his accent. She loved the godfather of her son and tended to be a little sweeter on the man. She really did hate lying to him but she was going to stick as close to the truth as possible.

"I um told him I was pregnant again." She finished it with a smile because she finally got to tell someone other than Juice but it was also a little scary.

"You're pregnant. Shite. You don't need me calling and worrying you. But I need to tell you so you can inform Juice if he calls." She heard Chibs let out a sigh, "Clay got shot at the clubhouse and we're at the hospital now." She sank on to the bed.

"Are you serious? Who shot Clay?" She wasn't very fond of the man but Juice loved Clay."

"We don't know yet but you'll call me if you hear from him? Right?" Chibs, he knew more than he was letting on and that worried her.

"Yeah, if I talk to him you'll be the first to know. Night Chibs love you." She was hoping that Juice would at the very least call her soon.

"Love you too and give Jace my love." Chibs one of the toughest guys she knew and yet once Jace was in his arms he turned into a teddy bear.

~SOA~

She heard a motorcycle's motor and she jumped off her bed with Meth trailing behind her; Jace was in his crib a sleep. She threw open the door and saw him pulling his helmet off; her heart clenched in her chest. He got off his bike and she ran into his arms. "Are you okay?" She kissed any part of him she could reach.

"Yeah I'm okay. How about you?" Juice was holding her off the ground and walking toward the house. "Come on Meth."

"Better now." She just held onto him as tight as she could not wanting to lose the contact. "Um I have something to tell you."

He set her back on her feet, "It can wait just let me get something out of my bag and then me, you and Jace are going to spend the rest of the night together, no matter what."

She nodded and watched as he walked out to his bike pulling out a file. She wondered what it was but let it go as he picked up her hand towing her down the hall.

A few hours went past and Jace was a sleep in the middle of the bed while Juice sat on the edge. Selena sat behind him watching him staring down at the file that was the only remind of the last couple of weeks.

She placed her chin on his shoulder, "you need to come clean with everything, to me, to Chibs, maybe he can help you break it to the club. They need to know this and I need to know you're safe and not lying in some ditch somewhere because the club or somebody else got to you." As she spoke her voice got thicker with anger.

She felt him tense up; He rose off the bed. "If I don't are you going to tell him? Would you sell me out?" He was glaring at her.

"No. How could you think that after everything? I gave up my family for you. I deprived my father of his daughter and grandson for you. I don't even get to see him unless he's here doing business or he's been shot. I love you but I have to know what is going on if I'm going to raise your kids or even marry you."

He stalked toward her, dripped her arms. "You think I don't know what you've done for me Selena? I do okay. Jesus Christ. I sold out my fucking club because I don't want to die but I'll probably end up dead anyway."

"Are you blaming me for that? I didn't ask to lie? Juice if you had told him from the start maybe we wouldn't be here right now? This shit is getting crazy. Clay got shot last night, Bobby's missing and I had to lie for you."

"What? Why are you just now telling me about this? Shit." He ran his hands over his hand. She snorted. "What?"

"Nothing. You need to call Chibs and let him know you're alive." She turned back to the bed where fortunately her son was still asleep. It was at time like this Jace reminded her of Juice so much.

She heard Juice walk out of the room and his voice was coming from the living room. She picked up the file that lay on the nightstand. She flipped it opened and saw a picture of Juice's father; she pulled it out placing it beside the lamp.

She read through his file but found nothing new and no more information about why they had blacked mailed him in the first place. "What are you doing?" His voice sounded harsh to her ears.

"Does it matter? I'm not Tara or Gemma. I let you do pretty much what you want. I don't try to make you choose a better life or dig in club business." She shook the file at him. "But this is my business. This could mean the difference between my kids having a father or being raised by that fucking club."

He tried to grab it, "Damnit Selena just give it to me."

"No tell me what this hell is going on?" She held it out of his reach and demanded an answer.

"I don't have time for this." He made sure the baby was safe before pushing her down onto the bed with his body. He ripped the file out of her hand.

"Fine. You don't have time to answer me then you don't have time to be my husband or a father." She was still pinned to the bed.

"What are you going to do leave? Go ahead." He threw the file to the floor and pinned down her arms.

"You think I wouldn't I just told you I'm not Tara. I don't need you to get by. I will raise my kids without you." She was pissed. She knew she was slicing open new and old wounds.

"I know you could but you won't." His lips were inches away from hers. "You wouldn't do that to lil Juan Carlos." She turned her head to look at her son.

"I hate you." She whispered to him staring up into his eyes.

"No you don't. Look this was about RICO. Either I help them or go back to prison I couldn't do that to you or him but now I can be killed by my own club I ratted Selena. I'm a goddamn rat." His eyes held so much sorrow, so much pain. "I have to go to the clubhouse. We're meeting to settle things up."

She felt her anger disappearing and she really hated that she never stayed mad at him long. "Chibs told me about you telling him. He also said I was an asshole for leaving and making you worry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry we're fighting. I'm sorry I keep disappointing you. I'm sorry I put you in this position. I love you."

He dropped his head into the crook of her neck. She closed her eyes. "I love you too but this can't keep happening Juice. I don't ask for much. But you're stressing and the possibility you could die isn't good for me."

**End of Season 4.**


	17. Sovereign

Three weeks of peace between them. In those three weeks they had set a wedding date for after the baby was born. They still fought but it was little things not about secrets and sacrifices.

She was getting ready to go to Piney's wake. Her hair was pulled up on top of her head and she wore a simple black dress that would hide her baby bump. She sat on the bed putting on her black pumps. She sighed. Juice was helping Clay move into the cabin and would meet her there.

She was leaving Jace with Anita. She kissed her son good bye and waved at Anita as she left. She got to the cemetery parking just in front of Opie's bike. She saw him standing in the middle of the plots and walked toward him.

"Hey." He turned to look at her and she saw all the pain in his eyes. "Oh Opie, honey." She hugged the man who had been a friend and a brother over the last few years. She felt the tears start to fall. "I'm so sorry."

"Pop would have loved to know that a beautiful woman was crying over him." She laughed at him as she pulled back. She brushed the tears from her cheeks. "He treating you okay?"

She nodded, "Yeah I'm pregnant so everything is just really heightened, ya know?" His eyes widened at her words. "Oops don't tell."

He frowned. "I won't be are you happy about it?" He was always worried about her happiness and how this life was affecting her.

"I am actually." She heard the roar of the motorcycles and knew that the boys would be here soon. "Please keep it to yourself though." He nodded sadly. "I love you Opie and I wish I could take this pain from you. You deserve to be happy."

He pulled her to him. She felt him kiss her hair. "Thanks Selena and I love you too." After he released her she walked toward the men. They greeted her with kisses and hugs.

~SOA~

She was looking through wedding magazines looking at flowers and designs while Jace sat in his walker making noises. She snorted at all the pink and delicate things in the books; Juice would laugh his ass off at her if she even suggested it.

She sighed and threw the magazine over her shoulder in frustration; the only thing she knew was that her dress would be white and that she would be getting married at Saint Michael's in Oakland. But the reception would be at the clubhouse and that was because Gemma had guilted her into it.

She pulled Jace's walker toward her and blew a raspberry at the boy who threw he's head back laughing. "What do you think about lace and leather baby boy? Huh?" She made a face. "Daddy and Da would love it but grandpapi wouldn't. What am I going to do?" She had taken to referring to Chibs as Da to the baby because she wanted to have something easy for him to say.

Chibs had glared and whined at first but soon let it go, cracking a joke at Juice's expense, "How's it feel to know your kid is going to say my name first?" Juice had just rolled his eyes at the man.

She heard the door open and Juice call out, "Selena?" She watched as her son's eyes went wide and he stood on his toes and squealed.

She laughed, "In here." She watched her son because once he saw Juice he would start clapping and bouncing. Sometimes she felt like doing that herself when she saw the man.

"Hey Jace." The boy was jumping so hard he moved the walker back. "Hey baby." He picked Jace up out of the walker before sitting on the couch behind her. "What's going on in here?"

She stood up, "Let's see I can't find a damn thing for our wedding. I have to wait to go dress shopping. I think that's about it. How did moving Clay into the cabin go?" She sat at an angle on the couch with her elbow on the back and her head resting on her fist.

"It went okay. He misses Gemma you know?" He bounced Jace in his lap as she nodded. "He um told us today that he killed Piney and Opie shot him." She gasped.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me. What the hell is wrong with these people?" She rubbed her forehead. "Things were going so good. I told Opie about the baby."

He smiled at her before kissing her. "Good. I'll tell the boys later and Chibs already knows. That's okay right? I don't want to rush you to tell people. I know it's been rough the last couple of months."

She kissed him. "That's fine. It's got a lot better. I'm far enough along now that I'm not worried about miscarrying. I love you." She sat for a few minutes before speaking, "Poor Opie. Clay killed Donna and now Piney." Juice's head whipped around and she covered her mouth with her hand.

"How did you know about Donna?" He asked shocked that she even knew about that. Hell she hadn't even been in town when that had happened.

"Opie told me while ya'll were in prison." She shifted realizing she'd probably had deeper conversations with a man who use to strongly dislike her than with the father of her children. "I also know why Clay killed Piney."

Juice's eyes got wide, "What? Why? Maybe you should have been a spy."

"Um I overheard Tara and Piney fighting over it and I got into a fight with Tara over keeping it to herself. She was supposed to give them to Jax but she didn't and look how that turned out." She rolled her eyes while Juice laughed.

"OOOOO and there's my bitchy baby mama." Juice said with a slight smirk. "Shit. I wonder who else knows?" He looked off into thought.

She shrugged. "I don't know but now you know everything I do. Huh, I like this honesty thing." Juice made a face at her.

"You are fucking crazy." He looked at Jace. "Your mama is fucking nuts." He stood up walking down the hall bouncing the boy.

"I blame you. This only happens when I'm pregnant." She yelled following them to Jace's room.


	18. Stolen Huffy (More like NOOOO)

She stood in the clubhouse crying. Juice had been keeping her up to date on matters concerning Tig,Chibs, and Jax being wanted and then on a happier note Jax and Tara getting married. She was happy for them, really she was.

She was standing in front of Chibs talking to him trying not to outright sob while Juice stood beside her shaking his head. "I'm sorry. I can't help it." Chibs gave her a sad smile as he wrapped his arms around her. She loved Chibs and she didn't want anything to happen to him; he'd been there when she gave birth to Jace and he was the one who she called when she was worried about either one of her boys.

"It's alright darlin'. I'll be okay. It'll all be okay, I promise." The older man squeezed her against him. "You take care of yourself and Jace and I'll take care of the rest, deal?"

She nodded as she pulled away, "You got a deal." She turned to hug could feel the pain and desperation in his embrace. Normally, she would feel a bit uncomfortable in these tight quarters. Tig always joked about the two of them hooking up and she always had half a mind that he wasn't really joking about it. This pitbull of a man had turned into a grieving father and for once she wished he would break out into inappropriate jokes. But there was little comfort for him. "I'm sorry about Dawn." She felt him nod into her hair. "Stay safe. Tig."

She took a deep breath as she moved away from the men. Juice was watching but not hovering over her. She walked over to where Tara and Jax stood whispering to each other. Her hormones were everywhere and she couldn't decide whether to feel happy or sad for them. Perhaps in this situation the feeling weren't self excluding.

She coughed and the couple looked at her, "I just wanted to say congratulations. I wish I could have been there to see you guys get married." She hugged Tara who whispered Thanks in her ear. Then she turned to Jax and put a maternally hand on his cheek. "Stay safe okay. I can't deal with your mother again."

Jax snorted at her. "Yeah I know. But keep an eye on her for me and don't forget to take care yourself." He kissed the side of her head as she nodded. She went back to stand with Juice who was still with Chibs.

"You okay?" She nodded as she pressed her face into his neck. She jumped as someone knocked at the door.

"San Joaquin County Sheriff open up." Eli Roosevelt's voice rang through the quieter than usually bar. Selena heard a few more whispers and then people moving. She stepped a bit to the side so Juice could hug his brother.

She gave them a sad smile as Chibs caressed the back of Juice's neck giving him a hug before moving toward the door. Selena picked up her fiance's hand silently telling him she was there.

She followed with the others, feeling like she was in a western, watching the two sides - the outlaws and the men of law - move in closer to each other. She was staring at Roosevelt, knowing he was just doing his job but still feeling dislike for the man. It was as the sheriffs walk toward the men with shackles that she heard the roar of a motorcycle as it sped into the lot. Selena knew it was Opie coming to see the boys off.

She watched as Opie parked his bike; she started to feel uneasy as she watched the tall man walk toward the sheriff of San Joaquin County.

She felt her eyes widen as she seen Opie pull back his fist and swung at the sheriff's face. Selena gasped as Opie's fist connect with Roosevelt's face. She made a noise in the back of her throat and took a step forward as she watched Opie fight the sheriffs.

Juice placed himself in front of her as the other sheriffs raised their shotguns at them. Selena found herself being torn between proud and pissed off at the man who had just a while back agreed to be the god-father of her second child.

She heard the words that Tara and Gemma spoke to each other and knew that Opie was staying close to protect his brothers but there was a huge pit in her stomach that something bad was going to happen while they were away.

She held Juice's hand as they watched the boys be carted away. She shook her head and knew she be going to mass come morning, she had people to pray for.

~SOA~

She was sitting in the office at Teller-Morrow doing paperwork.. Gemma had asked her to come in and work. It had been happening more often than not.

Hell, she had to put Jace in full time daycare because she was working what could be considered a full time job. She knew where Gemma was going and she didn't make a big fuss, she did have another child on the way after all.

Today was different however; today the boys were coming home not all of them alive. She gulped remembering the phone call from Tara and shook her head. She had swore to herself no more crying. She knew her hormones wouldn't help her keep the promise, which is why she couldn't help feel a bit enraged as well. Damn that idiot who sacrificed himself, damn Roosevelt and damn this club. There was no getting out of it now, there was just keeping what was left of her heart and sanity. She knew she might need to share some more tears eventually. She hoped she didn't have to but she would save them up for then. She looked up when she heard the roar of motorcycles and at the sight of them she felt her heart clench.

She sucked in a breath and walked out of the office closing the door. Juice had wanted her to stay at home but she couldn't; not today. She saw the men walk into the clubhouse to meet and she could see the tension in their shoulders.

~SOA~

She sat at the bar as they talked inside the church, sipping on her water. She heard the doors open but didn't look back; however when she felt a kiss on the side of the head she smiled slightly. The first was followed by a few more as the men moved passed her ending with a peck on the lips and a whispered 'love you babe' before the guys headed out.

She was texting the daycare when she heard, "Hey baby girl, Can you help us?" It was Tig asking for her help and she saw from the look in his eyes it had to do with Opie.

~SOA~

"He's here. You coming out?" Tig asked her. She nodded and took the arm he offered her. She walked out and on seeing the hearse bit her lip to keep from crying. As they got closer to the hearse Tig released her so that he could carry Opie.

"That's a nice looking box, man." Juice said. She nodded in an agreement really feeling the lump in her throat. "Op would have dug it." Selena gave a weak smile and looked up seeing Layla.

She walked away from the men over to her former co-worker. "Hi." They both whispered to each other; Selena placed her arms around Layla's shoulder as Jax walked over.

"I'm so sorry." Jax said to Layla. Layla just shook her head and started to cry which broke Selena. Jax wrapped his arms around both women but Selena pulled away leaving just Layla in his arms. Selena sniffled as she pulled a tissue out of her pocket to wipe her nose.

"Come on." Jax said leading them into the clubhouse; Selena took Layla's hand as they walked; before they entered the door she felt Layla squeeze her hand. They stood together and watched as they removed the lid of Opie's coffin.

"Let's go. Give her a minute." Bobby said. The men walked out of the room and Selena went to follow but Layla stopped her with a whispered please and tightening the grip on her hand. Selena just nodded and looked at Jax.

Layla and Selena walked up to the coffin; Layla started to sob. "Take as much time as you need." Selena looked down into the black boxed lined in gray satin at the man who was her friend and brother. She was tuning Layla's crying out as she thought back to being in labor and clinging to the bear of a man's hand and him making fun of her.

She jumped a little as she heard Layla ask, "What do I do?" She turned toward Selena and Jax. "I can't raise three kids on my own. I can barely cover me and Piper. How am I suppose to care for those kids and earn a living?" She has released Selena's hand.

Selena felt Jax stand beside her, "Just like every other single mother. You get help. Your friends, your family." Selena felt herself nod along with what Jax was saying.

"My mom lives two hours away. I don't have family up here." Suddenly Selena felt like chopped liver.

"Let me show you something." Jax said. Selena looked at Jax and knew this was hard for him but he was still trying. Jax motioned for Layla to follow him with his head. He opened the blind to reveal people coming into the clubhouse with food and other Sons standing around waiting. "That's your family. Anything you need, you just ask. Anyone says no they answer to me."

"And me. I'm here; whatever you need, just a phone call away. I'll help with the kids. You're not alone. You're my family." Selena said rubbing Layla's arm. Layla nodded before hugging her and whispering thank you. She just nodded. Jax smiled at her as he started to head out and mouth 'thank you' at her as well.

~SOA~

She stood at the head of the coffin, no one was close enough to hear. "I'm pissed at you Opie. Pissed. Do you hear me? You left those kids with no father. You left Layla with no husband. You left Jax without a friend. You left me without a brother. We need you." She sighed. "If you were here you'd call me on my bullshit and tell me to suck it up." She snorted. "I hope you found her Opie and I hope you're safe." She placed a picture of him holding a newborn Jace into the coffin. "I love you, Opie." She kissed his cheek before moving away.

She went to stand with Layla and Gemma waiting for Jax to come down. Everyone stood as Jax entered and moved toward Opie's coffin. Selena felt her chin tremble as she looked on at Jax telling his brother and friend goodbye. Watching as the boys covered the coffin back up and lift him made it even more real.

Everyone followed Jax and Opie's coffin out to the hearse. It was a physical pain as she watched them load him in the back of the hearse. She gripped Layla's hand feeling a tear slide down her own cheek as Jax closed the door on Opie's body.

~SOA~

She sat in the swing at the clubhouse moving back and forth; Juice was in the one beside her. "You ready to go home?"

"You know I've worn this dress twice in one week? Twice, not to mention these shoes which Piney loved because they made my ass stick out." She was playing with the hem, not looking up at him. "Plus I've cried so many times this week. I'm tired, Juice."

She looked up at him to find him watching her intently. "What?" She knew her eyes were swollen and red but he had seen that before so that wasn't it. "Do I have something on my face?"

He shook his head, "No, that's not it." He stood up stuffing his hands into his cut. "I fucked up, Selena." She frowned confused with how this conversation was going. She had just been talking about her feelings and now he was confessing.

"What are you talking about?" She was so lost as to where this was heading. "Look I think I've had enough bad news in the last 24 hours, can it wait?"

"No it can't. Opie dying made me realize I might not have tomorrow." He was looking at her with something she couldn't quite describe, it was in between pleading and despair.

"Don't say that Juan. I can't even hear that right now." She stood up moving away from the man.

"I know it's hard for you. I know today has been hard but I have to tell you. I can't walk around with this okay so just let me say it." She glared at him. He stood in front of her, "I cheated on you."

She blinked, "Excuse me?"

"That women who was here tonight with Nero. I slept with her when I took Clay to see where Gemma's been going." There was that puppy dog look again.

"This couldn't have waited. Opie just died." She was pissed. "How could you do this to me? How could you do this to Jace?" She started to pound on his chest with ball up fist. "How could you?" She howled.

He wrapped his arms around her to still her hands. She clung to his cut and sobbed feeling alone. She felt a cramp in her stomach, "OW."

"Are you okay?" He asked looking down at her.

She shook her head 'no', "I think you need to take me to the hospital."


	19. Orca Shrugged

_Juice_

It had been a long rough night for him. He was stupid okay; it didn't take a scientist to figure that shit out. Yeah he had taken their happy, stable relationship and burnt it to ashes but he never meant to hurt her or the baby. I know you're asking then why did he do it? He was never ready to become a father or husband for God's sake.

He cursed himself all the way to the hospital and prayed that Selena and the baby would be okay. She was five months along so it couldn't be a miscarriage, right? He rushed her in and she was whisked away from him.

"Sir we need you to stay and fill out the paperwork. We're going to help her as best we can." A nurse told him handing him a clipboard with forms.

"But-"

"Sir if you're back there you'll just be in the doctor's way." She moved him to a chair in the waiting room. "Sit here and the doctor should be out soon." He did as she said. He filled out the forms, handed them in and stared at the doors they had taken her through.

His leg bounced as he frantically whispered to himself, "Please, please, please, please", head bent between his shaking arms. He felt his phone vibrate in his cut. It was Anita; "Shit", he thought. .

"Hey, I'm sorry. I should have called you." He listen as Anita said it was okay and that she was just making sure they were okay. "Actually we're at the hospital."

_What happened? _

"Selena started having really bad cramps. She's five months in; she can't lose the baby now, can she?" Juice waited for a confirmation to his prayers but all he got was the dead noise of silence.

_Is she Okay?_

"I don't know anything yet. They took her back and haven't talked to me yet." His voice trailed and broke at the end. With everything that had been going on lately, Juice felt like this was maybe God's way of punishing him. He didn't really believe in God but he hoped he had it in His heart to inflict it on him and not on the woman he loved with all his being.

_Do you want me to call anyone?_

"No don't worry about it. Can you keep Jace for the next couple of days?" He couldn't take care of Jace by himself, he thought. He wondered if he ever could.

_Yes. I'll go and get him some clothes from your house._

"Thanks. I'll let you know when I find something out." He hung up and seriously thought about calling Chibs or Clay or Jax or even Tara, somebody so he wouldn't be alone, knowing he could be the reason she lost their child.

~SOA~

Don't ask him how long he sat there, all he knew was he hadn't moved since turning in the forms. No one had come out of the door for anything and no one had gone in. He just knew something was wrong, if it was taking this long something was very wrong.

Suddenly the doors opened and a dark haired woman came through the doors with a clipboard, "Mr. Ortiz?" She didn't look at him. "If you'll follow me back, I'll take you to see your fiance as she so eloquently told me."

He snorted with relief because that meant she was fine; he could imagine Selena saying, 'he is not my fucking boyfriend we are getting married.' They walked down a hallway, made a left and then a right. "Here we are. Now we have her sedated but she and the baby are just fine. The cramping came from stress and dehydration. Has she been stressed lately?"

Juice could feel the doctor's eyes analyzing and judging him. He didn't need this from her; he was already blaming himself enough. "Yeah her best friend went to jail and didn't make it out alive. The doctor looked taken aback.

"I'm sorry to hear that. We're suggesting, strongly suggesting, that Ms. Fox be on bed rest for the next couple of days and have plenty of fluids. We're going to release her tomorrow morning but only if her blood test come back saying everything is okay."

He released the breath he was holding. "Thanks doc. Can I go and sit with her?"

The doctor nodded, "Yes as long as you don't upset her." He nodded and pushed the door open. He gulped as he saw her laying in the bed with an IV coming out of her arm and other assorted cables hooked up to her. She was pale and the circles under her eyes looked darker.

He took the chair beside the bed, picking up her hand; to him it seem thinner and smaller now than it did just a few hours ago. "I'm so sorry." He whispered before kissing the back of her hand where her ring sat, claiming her as his.

~SOA~

He sat at the table in church, fidgeting and wishing he had his phone in his hand. "You alright Juice?" Jax asked him. Everyone at the table was now looking at him and they could see he didn't want to be there.

He sighed. "Selena just got out of the hospital this morning." A murmur of "What?" echoed throughout the room. He rubbed his face. "Look I'm here; I just wish I had my phone. Her sister-in-law is staying with her and Anita has Jace."

"Whoa, back up; what the hell happened? She was fine when I kissed her goodnight." Tig said and got a glare from Juice.

"She started having really bad cramps and I took her to the hospital and the doctor said it was due to stress and dehydration. She's on bed rest for the next couple of days but she's fine." Juice didn't look his brothers in the eyes. "I'm here and I can do whatever you need. So don't worry."

_Selena_

Honest to god she wasn't mad that he had slept with someone; hell if she hadn't been pregnant and so not in the mood, she'd pay him back by sleeping with Tig. The fact that Tig constantly and teasingly flirted with Selena every chance he got, pissed Juice off.

Sleeping with Tig would make a point but once again she really didn't feel in the mood. She lay in their bed, waiting for him to call so they could talk while he was waiting on the Irish. She sighed as her brother Alejandro's wife came into the room. She had called her father and he had sent Maria down. Maria sat a water bottle beside the bed along with a bowl of healthy snacks, ugh. "Thanks."

Maria just nodded and walked out to do chores around the house. Selena really felt like rolling her eyes but held back. Her phone rang and she knew who it was, "Hello?"

"What do I have to do to make this up to you?" Right to the point; that was their relationship; blunt with no more secrets. Or at least she hoped.

"Nothing Juice, although next time can you at least let me know at a better time. Look I'm not mad at you." She sighed into the phone.

"Then who are you mad at Selena?" Juice asked her and there was something in his voice.

"At myself, I guess." She closed her eyes and rested her head on the headboard.

"Yourself?" He sounded surprised. "Baby you didn't do anything wrong. I swear on Jace and baby #2 that was the last time. I'll never sleep with another woman. I promise." There was an ache to his voice as if he thought she was going to push him out of her life.

She could see why he would think that. Look at the last couple of years; kidnapped, him going to jail and then prison, he tried to kill himself and kept secrets that could have hurt them; it would break any relationship but they weren't any relationship.

"I'm mad because I forgot what this life was like. I'm mad because I thought I was different from Gemma, Tara or Lyla." She laughed. "You just reminded me what it is like to be an old lady."

"Shit baby, no. That's not how it fucking is. Don't accept that bullshit. Fight me. Tell me to go to hell. Damn tell me to get the fuck out, throw my ring back at me and say we're over. Just don't give up, please." She wanted to laugh.

Being pregnant had made her soft but she knew he was right. "Next time I promise. Can I just forgive you and wait for you to get home so we can cuddle?"

"Yeah but Selena there won't be a next time. You're it for me." The husky sound in his voice sent chills up her back. "I love you. Rest."

"Love you too Juice."

~SOA~

"You will never believe the shit that happened today." Juice walked into the bedroom with a smile and pulling his cut off. He placed it on the back of the chair carefully.

She raised an eyebrow at the man as he stripped down. "What happened?"

"Tig was hitting on a transvestite." He grinned at her.

"He what?"

"Yeah. We were doing something and Venus Van Dam showed up and Tig was totally into that." He laughed.

"I'm not going to ask because I don't wanna know. Did he at least get her number?" Selena was watching as he moved.

"Nah, she wasn't into him." He climbed into bed. "Tig did, however, get his ass bit today."

She laughed, "What?"

"Yeah this guy took a chunk out of his ass. Tara and Chibs patched him up." He slid so that he lay across the bed with his head in her lap. "How was your day?"

"Boring. Maria won't talk to me." Juice frowned. "I think she's pissed about my father sending her down."

"Tell her to fuck off. I can get a Crow Eater over here to help, if you don't mind." He placed a large hand over her belly. "Hey baby."

"Could you? Then I'll have someone to talk to at least." He nodded.

"Are you sure you're not mad at me?" He asked with that puppy dog look.

"Yes. I love you too much just to leave because you slept with some whore." He laughed.

"Not mad huh?" He got up. "I'll make us some dinner and then we'll cuddle and watch a movie." He kissed her lips.

"Sounds good to me." She smiled. The one question she will never be able to answer, even if she lived a thousand years is: Why does she stay with a man that's lied and cheated on her? At sixteen she knew she would never be that woman but here she was. Sometimes, though love was more important than pride.


	20. Ablation

"You are supposed to be on bedrest." Chibs said as soon as he saw her get off the elevator. She rolled her eyes.

"Yeah like I was going to lay in that bed and wait for a phone call. How are they?" Chibs pulled her over to the sitting area. He picked up her legs placing them on the table.

"Abel's heart was irregular they're fixing it now." He said picking up her hand and lacing their fingers. "Tommy is fine and Gemma's got a few bumps and bruises but she's gonna be okay. How about you baby girl?"

"I'm fine. The baby's fine." She noticed that it was only Bobby, Chibs and Tig sitting with her. "I got here before Juice?"

"Yeah. You only live about ten minutes away. He was with Clay." She nodded and leaned against Chibs. A few minutes later the others showed up, Juice's face registering another shock upon seeing Selena there.

"Babe what are you doing here?" Juice asked at once. Chibs laughed.

"She's fine, Juicy. Her feet are up and she's relaxed. She didn't want to wait on a phone call so she showed up." Chibs smiled at her.

The guys brought the newcomers up to speed. Juice and Selena were talking about the wedding when Unser showed up and Bobby got up to greet him. They talked, then Bobby,Tig and Chibs conspicuously went down the hall.

"Are you sure you're okay?" asked Juice, turning his worried look from his brothers to his woman.

"Yes I'm fine look, I'm relaxed and my heartbeat is regular. We are fine." She smiled at her trying to convince him.

"Okay if you start feeling stressed I'm taking you home." He kissed her.

~SOA~

Selena was in the bathroom when Sheriff Roosevelt made an appearance. Clay walked up to the man. "The club owes you an apology."

"For killing my wife?" Roosevelt asked.

"For being careless about new members." Clay said

"They were white, racist and violent. That fits all the requirements, right?" Roosevelt threw back at him.

Clay looked uncomfortable as he asked, "What do you need from us?"

Roosevelt didn't look surprised that Clay was helping, "Detectives are gonna want to talk to you all about the Nomads and they'll need any records you have on them."

Bobby step forward, "Well it ain't gonna be much. They were only in the Charter a heartbeat."

Juice stood up saying, "I'll pull what we have." Juice was nervous anyway with Roosevelt being so close.

"Ortiz." Roosevelt pointed at him. "Let me see you for a minute." Juice felt his heartbeat pick up.

"Why?" Juice asked.

"Now." Roosevelt walked through the doors. Juice looked at his brothers like 'you believe this.' and followed the sheriff.

"So where's Frankie Diamonds?" Roosevelt cut right to the chase.

"I got no idea." Juice made a face. Why would he know? He's been Clay's bitch for the last couple weeks.

"Is he the one calling the shots?" Juice wanted to laugh, Frankie was slow and dumb.

"I don't know, man." He didn't like where this was going.

"Well then find out." Roosevelt looked pissed and Juice got it; he understood. He would kill anyone who attacked Selena and his kids.

Juice slightly shook his head. "Who do you think I am, dude? I don't know shit. They don't tell me anything unless it's public knowledge." The door opened and he stopped talking.

Juice gave a slight smile but then Roosevelt said, "You seem a little nervous. I bet you Clay's real curious about our private little conversation right here. Our blood bond we share."

Juice glared at the man, "You're going to get me killed."

"That concern left me when I watched my wife die." Roosevelt started to walk away but Juice grabbed his arm.

"Yeah what about my wife and my kids, huh? How do you think Selena will handle me dying? I had to take her to the E.R. after we buried Opie. She doesn't need this now." Juice paused to look into the man's eyes and see if he had any reaction. What he saw frightened him.

"I told her about us. She knows that you had something to do with me almost dying. You don't want me on your conscience, man." Juice released his arm and walked back to his brothers.

~SOA~

"Selena?" Juice called out into the house. He had picked up Jace from Anita's and the boy was asleep in his carrier.

"In here." Her voice came from down the hall. He walked to Jace's room and found her sitting on the floor folding clothes and putting them in a box.

He sat Jace's carrier on the changing table and took the sleeping baby out. "What are you doing? You need to go to bed."

"I'm fine. I'm just putting the clothes Jace grew out of in a box for this one." She placed a hand on her bump.

He laid Jace down and sat beside her in the floor. "How do you know it's a boy it could be a girl?" Selena smiled at him.

"I just know. Are you okay?" She placed her hand on the side of the face seeing the sorrow in his brown eyes.

"Roosevelt is threatening me and I told Clay about the RICO case." He kept his eyes down as he spoke to her and hoped this didn't stress her out any more.

"Fuck. Clay knows?" Juice nodded. Selena tried to stand up but Juice had to help her. "What'd he say?"

"He's not going to say anything. I just wanted you to know in case Roosevelt says anything." Juice watched as Selena sighed.

"I love you Juan. I can't lose you." Selena said pouting. It was a thing now; Juice knew it was just hormones but she pouted a lot these days.

"I know." He kissed and pulled her down the hall to their room.

~SOA~

He was coming home from Clay's and saw a Sheriff's car sitting outside his house. "Really? You're sitting on my house?"

The tall one spoke, "Taking you in for questioning."

"For what?" He hoped Selena was asleep.

"The attack at Unser's."

"Now?" He couldn't believe this shit. He just wanted to kiss Jace goodnight and sleep in the bed with the woman he loved.

"Which way we going to do this?"

"This is bullshit." He gave up and got in the back of the police car.

Going in the Sheriff's Department the guy took him to Roosevelt's office, _fuck._ He walked in and noticed the sheriff looked a little rough.

"Are you kidding me with this shit?" Juice asked pissed.

"Shut up and listen." The man looked desperate. "Jax knows it was you who gave up the club, okay? You got to get out of Charming, now."

"You ratted me out?" Juice couldn't believe it. Roosevelt knew about Selena and the babies.

"No, I needed ?" Eli said it like Juice would understand and he did. "Told Jax that I would give him some intel on a rat."

Juice was still in shock, "Frankie's dead."

"I know. I didn't tell Jax, he already knew that it was you. I'm sorry." Roosevelt seemed sorry, he really did. "Is there anything I can do?" He stood watching Juice think, "Juice."

Juice jumped at the man's voice and shook his head, "No. No I've got it." Juice left the office looking like his life was over and it was.

~SOA~

Juice walked into his house and head straight to his bedroom. He turned the light on and started packing his bag; refusing to look at the woman asleep in his bed, the one who had changed his life.

He scoffed and threw bag down, "Fuck." He couldn't leave. He couldn't force her to leave. He couldn't leave Jace. He sank down on the bed placing his head in hands.

"Juice?" He heard her sleepy voice and he felt the bed move. "What's wrong, baby?" She wrapped her arms around him and leaned over his shoulder to look at his face. He felt her belly pressed against his back.

"Jax knows I ratted." He watched as her green eyes got darker and the pissed expression that came over her face with the realization of the facts. "No one told him; he figured it out although I don't think it helped things that me and Roosevelt had such a close relationship."

Selena nodded. "Whatever you need to do Juice. I'm here, We're here."

He smiled at her. "I know. What do you think I should do?" He asked.

"I think you should go and talk to Jax but it's up to you, Juan." She kissed his cheek and released him. She laid back in the bed and patted the mattress.

~SOA~

He made his decision; he took a breath, knocked on the door and waited for it to open. "Oh hey Juice."

"Hey Tara, can I come in. Jax up yet?" Tara stepped back to let him in. He noticed Abel was playing on the floor.

"No, not yet. Can you watch Abel while I finish getting ready?" Tara smiled at him and he nodded. "Okay I'll be right back."

Tara walked down the hall as Juice sat on the floor in front of Abel. Juice was just glad the boy was okay; Selena had a soft spot for Abel like most of the boys in the clubhouse including Juice.

They were playing cars when Jax walked through, "Hey."

"Morning." Juice got up and followed Jax into the kitchen.

"Want some coffee?" Jax asked.

"I'm good." Yeah he was putting his life on the line the last thing he wanted was coffee.

"So what's going on?" Jax asked like he didn't know why Juice was there.

"I know you know. Eli told me, hoping that I'd split." Jax looked as if he didn't care. "I got no place to go, Jax. No friends, no family except for Selena and my 's not going to leave, not with a baby. Things would turn to shit no matter where I went." He sat down in front of Jax.

"I know about the leverage." Jax said, _fuck. _"Chibs."

Juice felt like he'd been hit, "He knows."

"Him and Bobby. Why didn't you tell me?" Jax asked. Yeah tell the prince of the MC about how you've got a black daddy; that would end well. Maybe it would have, but who knows.

"Feds had us on RICO. They wanted the Cartel and the Irish more than said if I gave them intel on the guns and the coke they would only take the Sons who were at the buy. Leave the rest of the MC intact. I was just trying to protect the club."

Jax shook his head, "Miles didn't steal the coke did he? He caught you stealing it?"

"That was an accident."

"Shut up." Juice felt the tears start. He knew he probably wouldn't get to go home. "Do you wanna earn your way back in?" Juice looked hesitant. "A pardon."

He wasn't ready to start hoping. "What does that mean?"

"It means you do everything I tell you to do and I make sure your betrayal never hits the table. Stays between us." Jax promised.

Juice felt slightly relieved, "Yes of course. The club is all I've got. You know that. Just tell me what you need me to do."

"Clay. He was the one behind the Nomads." Juice felt a shock go through him. "Setting shit on fire to sabotage my leadership. Rita's murder, killing the Nomads, the attacks on me and Unser; that all happened because of your pal Clay."

"Shit." Juice shook his head realizing Frankie had been telling the truth.

"What?" Jax asked.

"Frankie tried to tell me that." Juice couldn't believe this shit.

"Tell you what?" Jax asked interested

"He said Clay was behind the break ins. That the nomads stole a safe from his house but gave Clay back all the legal shit." Juice knew he was feeding the fires.

"You're gonna find those documents, Juice. Cause that's going to prove that Frankie's story is true. That Clay is a traitor and a murder. I know you're close to him, bro. But he's poison and you don't know the half of it." Jax was feeding him reason to give Clay up.

Juice shook his head and felt like he was betraying one of the few people that cared about him. "Jesus Christ Jax. He knows about me and RICO. Put it together, same way you did."

Jax's face never changed, "When?"

"Couple of days ago." Juice knew his life was coming apart.

"It's a simple choice, Juice. You help me bring Clay down or you'll lose your patch and I think you know what killing another member gets you." Jax was leaning across the table.

"Okay." What choice did he have? Really it was more of a question his life or having Selena crying over his casket. "I'm in."

~SOA~

She was cleaning up the kitchen after feeding Jace. She had felt the baby move today and couldn't wait to tell Juice. She was about to throw the dish rag in the sink when she felt arms wrap around her.

His head went to her neck and he just stood there holding onto her. She leaned against him for a few minutes before turning so she could look into his eyes. Her green ones looked up into his brown ones finding nothing but pain.

"What happened with Jax?" She asked but he just shook his head and pulled her close, just holding her and breathing her in.

"I realized today that I would do anything for you and my kids, Selena. I know you need me and I'm going to do whatever it takes to be a better man even if it means I lose one of my best friends." He spoke this into her hair and wouldn't allow her to pull away to look at him.

"What do you mean? What have you done, Juice?" She had given up pushing him away. "Juice who did you kill?"

"I haven't killed anyone. Jax asked me to help take down Clay." She heard the tears in his voice. "I have to find proof that he was behind the break-ins, attacking Jax and Unser and killing the Sheriff's wife."

"Why would Jax ask you to do that?" She asked needing to know why Juice was being dragged into something that could get him killed.

"Because we're close and I have more of a chance to find it plus Jax promised that the club will never find out about me and RICO." Juice was rubbing her back.

Selena sighed and relaxed in his arms, "As long as it doesn't get you killed."


End file.
